Maelstrom 12 Unicron
by illmatar
Summary: Lancer doesn't like the moon and Ultra Magnus has a bad month. Scene contains strong language, violence, and sex. Rated M for adult themes! Really! Some of my old readers literally had nightmares. Crits Please!
1. Chapter 1

Maelstrom Chapter 24  
Unicron PART A 

Author's note: This story is part of a LONG series called Maelstrom. It is strictly Gen. 1 - sorry, but that was all that was out when I started writing back in the late 1980's. It began as a fan-publication so the first chapters are in the form of a comic book! If you have not read the nine original **Maelstrom Comics** and the preceding text stories, I strongly suggest you do. This is a complex universe. They can be found at http// illmatar. deviantart. com (I have put double spaces between the URL here or FF . Net eats the link.) The comics and art which accompanies this series are there...and believe me I am a better artist than writer.

This scene contains strong language and Dubious Humor. IT CONTAINS SOME MAJOR DEVELOPMENTS BETWEEN CHARACTERS BUT IS GENERALLY A FLUFF SCENE.

**Most chapters of this series contain strong language and violence. Rated M for adult themes! Really! Transformers characters belong to Hasbro. Critiques adored!**

Maelstrom Chapter 25 Unicron: PART A

Several people had noted Lancer's odd behavior over the months following her injury, but it was Marissa who finally noticed the pattern and put it into words.

"Lancer, you don't like the moon much do you?"

They were having dessert after a full, full meal at Marissa's house. The EDC Captain had invited them all: Spike, Carly, Jazz and KC, Lancer, Rodimus, and of course Ultra Magnus over for dinner. Spike and Carly had declined due to some last minute diplomatic squabbling with a pair of near-by systems. The regret in Spike's voice had been more than genuine - they had thought the trade agreement had been ironed out and now it looked like negotiations would have to start from scratch. Rodimus made no attempt to hide his relief that diplomatic maneuvers were Optimus Prime's bailiwick and that he would not be missing a night off listening politicians bitch at each other. Magnus didn't seem too disappointed either, attacking his meal with a gusto that made Rodimus cringe. Even Lancer seemed fairly relaxed which was what finally made Marissa recognize something was wrong.

Rodimus and Lancer had arrived first, and Marissa had a brush handy to help her recover from the head-tussling which had become Rodi's standard greeting. He laughed and told her she took the fun out of everything. She smiled and stuck her tongue out at him. Rodimus had on newish jeans ("at least I didn't wear the ones with the holes") and a casual white shirt. Lancer had even gotten him to tie his hair back so he looked almost presentable. Lancer wore grey cotton pants and a long-sleeved blouse with a rather high collar. It looked a little uncomfortable buttoned all the way to the top, but Marissa knew it was to hide the scars that trailed up from her shoulder. Lancer was embarrassed by those. They made themselves at home after Marissa refused to let them help in the kitchen, knowing that Rodi's breed of help was worse than none at all.

Magnus arrived about fifteen minutes later (fifteen minutes EARLIER than she had told him to get there). Marissa had deliberately told him a later time because she knew she wouldn't get anything done while he was there. He wore the casual blue pants and white shirt she had bought for him the previous weekend. Marissa sighed to herself. While the outfit was clean and wrinkle free, it was the third time that week he had worn it. There were other outfits in his closet but he seemed instinctively offended by anything that didn't match his Autobot colors. She was just glad none of the others had seen him in it before, since Rodi would tease him all night if they had. Magnus wandered into the kitchen to kiss her hello, which was fine, but then hung around looking into pans and sampling things, which was not.

"But I'm hungry!" he said, not quite whining.

"You're always hungry! Deal with it! OUT! OUT OF MY KITCHEN!" Marissa snapped. It wasn't until she picked up the cutting board with the full intent of using it on his hard head, that the mighty Ultra Magnus called a strategic retreat. Marissa didn't consider herself a domestic but she WAS commander-in- chief of her own damned kitchen! She could hear Rodimus start in on Magnus the moment he made it to the safety of the dining room, and briefly wondered what had possessed her to call this little get together. She heard Magnus laugh a little (saying he knew when he was outmatched) and smiled. Ah yes. That was it. Good. It was working...and worth it. She had begged Rodimus to find a way to schedule them all off together so that they could see each other OFF duty. The stress they had all been under lately had been pulling at the seams of their friendships and they needed some time to relax and enjoy each other for a while. Rodimus had agreed, and had worked a minor miracle pulling it off.

Jazz and KC had arrived rather late, in of all things a tuxedo and a formal evening gown. The gown in question was a stunning (literally STUNNING) hot pink with sequins and a large frilly bow in the back. From the smile plastered on poor KC's face she was doing her level best not to die of mortification, especially when Jazz made a big show of her. Marissa took pity on KC and didn't say anything while Jazz complimented himself for "picking her out something fine to wear that intensifies her hotness." He obviously thought them the height of fashion. Jazz explained he had purchased the outfits that day and had presented the dress to KC when he "rescued her from the maws of Perceptor's latest project." Upon closer inspection, Marissa did notice a tiny smear of silicon grease on the young scientist's right cheek, her hair looked barely brushed, and she wore absolutely no makeup. She was carrying a large bouquet of roses.

"I'll just put these in water," Marissa said, thanking her EDC training for allowing her to remain calm in a crisis. Casual dress indeed! She went into the kitchen to find something big enough and resigned herself to using her mother's old ice tea pitcher. None of her actual vases were heavy or deep enough. Leave it to Jazz to overdo things. She heard Rodi's voice rising in shock from the dining room.

"GREAT CYBERTRON! JAZZ! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO KC?!"

"No! Rodimus! It's all right sir!" Poor KC sounded desperate.

"ALL RIGHT!? I haven't seen anything that eye-bending since..since..."

"Since Hot Rod?" Lancer inserted smoothly. Magnus chuckled appreciatively.

There was a brief pause. "Right!" Rodimus cried. "Since Hot Rod! How could you do this to her?! I thought you liked her!"

"Hey man! She was gonna come in her uniform, and Marissa said absolutely NO UNIFORMS. She said nice, and casual and this is nice. We look good!"

"A Tux is NOT casual, and, and that salmon in sequins wouldn't look good anywhere! How many times do I have to tell you!? No shopping unless you have a chaperone with some sense!" Rodimus decreed. Behind Jazz's back, KC desperately met Rodi's eyes and slid two fingers repeatedly across her throat. She hissed trying to get him to shh up. He winked at her, acknowledging her frantic signals, but kept harassing Jazz in spite of her silent pleading. Jazz defended his selections as "stylish and classy."

Marissa went into the dining room to rescue humiliated KC. The poor girl looked ready to crawl into a deep hole.

"Dinner's ready!" she sang.

Dinner had gone pretty much as expected, although Marissa had been hoping for a FEW more leftovers, and she'd made enough for a Thanksgiving banquet. She'd known that Magnus and Jazz would more than make up for Rodi's neglected share but she'd forgotten that Lancer ate almost as much. The mutant's out-of-control metabolism made her a near match for Magnus' 7 foot appetite. Rodimus watch the three of them arguing over the scraps with amused disdain, while KC still seemed to be a bit overawed by everyone. She was relaxed around Jazz (who's attempts to be charming and gallant towards her went unremarked), and Marissa could tell Rodimus had seen to it that KC didn't take HIM too seriously. Unfortunately, KC was still responding to Magnus and Marissa as though they were her superiors even though they were all off duty. Lancer still made her quite nervous in spite of the weeks of intense training together (or maybe it was because of them). Marissa could tell because KC jumped a little when Lancer growled at Magnus. He was trying to tweak the last slice out from under her fork just as she was reaching for it. There was a brief but intense staring contest which ended when Marissa elbowed her mate in the gut.

"Guests! Where are your manners?" Marissa whispered when Magnus glared at her. It hardly mattered what he thought though, Lancer had taken quick advantage of his distraction, and the piece was gone.

Magnus frowned a bit and caught KC staring at him again. She had been on and off through-out the meal. True to form, he didn't mince words.

"KC is there some reason in particular that you keep staring at me?"

Mortified, KC stammered "NO! I...I didn't mean to! Oh...!" She blushed a furious scarlet which did nothing to improve the appearance of the blinding frock.

Marissa laughed. "Oh, look at her blush!"

Magnus arched an eyebrow, "I'd rather look at YOU blush," he growled which, to his satisfaction and Rodi's intense amusement, she did. They teased Marissa for a moment but Rodimus wasn't about to let KC get off that easily. He wanted her to relax around them and he could see she was having a hard time disassociating what she knew of her superiors on-duty from a casual get-together. Quite frankly, she was staring at Magnus again as if he'd completely lost his mind, especially when the banter with Marissa got really flirtatious. It was certainly a side of him KC had never dreamt existed. Noticing that KC hadn't eaten much either, Rodimus pounced.

"I think KC's just enjoying the floor show Magnus! Or maybe she just lost her appetite watching you three animals make pigs of yourselves!"

"Hey man! I've been downright restrained this evening!" Jazz said indignantly.

"Not eating yourself sick is not restraint, Jazz!" Lancer said primly. Then she turned on Rodimus, "And you! You've got nerve picking on KC about not eating, Rodimus Prime! That roll on Jazz's plate looks suspiciously familiar."

Jazz looked down in surprise and said, "OH! Thanks man."

Rodimus glared at Jazz for not covering for him and started muttering under his breath while Lancer scrapped the last few drops of mashed potatoes onto his plate.

"I just had to say something didn't I? I just had to call attention to myself! Try to make everyone look at KC, but NO! That doesn't work! Everyone has to start picking on me instead! Just rolls right off the scientist and hits me in the face! Great! Just great!" he grumbled, as if to himself. He glared balefully at KC, as if she had done it deliberately.

This time even KC couldn't keep from laughing.

After dinner, Marissa suggested they head into her living room for dessert, which included Key-lime pie and ice-cream. Her living room was built to accommodate Transformers and had a fantastic view of Cybertron's restored city-scapes from the enormous picture window.

Marissa went around the room, handing out servings until she got to Jazz.

"I'm sorry Marissa, but Jazz isn't allowed to have any," KC said in the most authoritative tone any of them had ever heard from her. Jazz gawked in purest astonishment, and Rodimus laughed at the uncompromising glare that KC gave the Autobot Specialist.

"Learned a lot from Lancer didn't you?" he said. Lancer glared at him so he laughed at her too.

"I approve," Magnus said. "although she still needs to quit staring at me as if I'd grown another head!"

"Ahh, but you have!" Lancer said to him.

Magnus smirked. "She still doesn't have to stare!" he said.

KC blushed again, but didn't let that distract her from the real priority - keeping Jazz off sugar at all costs.

Marissa looked from Jazz to KC a few times and then pointedly handed the pie to Rodimus. Jazz did his best to look needy and pathetic as Rodimus glanced dubiously from the pie to his friend.

"I don't want this," Rodimus said and Jazz immediately perked up, "but I'm not going to let you have it! I know better." Jazz deflated, and looked even more forlorn when the pie in question was handed to Ultra Magnus. Magnus had finished his first piece in about four bites, and started Jazz's without missing a beat. He made a big show of chewing - staring right at Jazz and smiling in intense satisfaction.

Lancer and KC grinned at each other and went to work rubbing it in on poor, sugar-sensitive Jazz.

"Oh, Marissa! This is simply delicious!" Lancer said, wiping the last of the cream off her plate with her finger-tips. "May I have another piece?"

"Certainly," Marissa said.

"This is the best pie I've ever tasted Marissa!" KC said.

"Why thank you! It's my mother's recipe. My father refuses to eat anyone else's. He always claimed my mother couldn't cook to save her life but made up for with interest when it came to pie!"

"You guys are a real drag to hang out with," Jazz complained, crossing his arms and slouching down on the couch like a spoiled child.

"Autobots shouldn't pout Jazz," Rodimus said in his best "Optimus giving a speech" tone.

"Keep that in mind the next time Lancer insists you eat something... Sir!" Jazz spat testily. He really was disappointed, even though he knew full-well KC was justified in keeping him off the sugar. It wasn't his fault that it made him hyper! He couldn't resist their teasing for long though and was soon laughing with the rest of them.

Marissa wasn't sure when she noticed Lancer was drawing back from the conversation but when she did the EDC Captain wondered why. Of course, it wasn't often that a guest got fidgety just from moving to the living-room for desert. Nor was it common practice for guests, fidgety or not, to suddenly get up, pace the room a few times, stare out the window, and then close the curtains without even asking.

Even Rodimus seemed a bit surprised by that, looking at his mate with the concerned attention that told Marissa he was probably speaking to her mentally. Lancer seemed to shrug off whatever he was saying though, at least until Marissa asked about the moon. The question apparently took the young mutant completely off guard.

"Wha..Why do you say that?" Lancer asked. She was hardly aware of her own actions, let alone the cause of her agitation.

"You get antsy every time its in view!" Marissa said with a smile.

"I do not!" Lancer said indignantly. She hardly thought about the moon. What was there to think about?

"Oh, so you just like my curtains drawn? Aren't you the person who demanded another hospital room because the one you had had no windows and made you feel 'Like an ant in a mayonnaise jar' and then demanded another because you 'felt like you were being watched'?" Marissa said slyly.

Lancer frowned at Marissa suspiciously, glanced at the curtains (which were inexplicably drawn tight) and then back at Marissa. She shrugged as if it was no big deal, and tried to act casual about it. Lancer was in no mood to analyze her own actions; she certainly didn't want Marissa to do it for her. A suspicious sound made her turn her head and glare.

Rodimus was snickering. SNICKERING!

Lancer gave him The Super-Deluxe Slant Eyed Laser Stare, patent pending.

Rodi laughed in her face. Even Magnus was impressed by his stupidity.

"She's right, you know!" Rodimus said, miraculously unharmed and unfazed by The Stare. "You get edgy when the moon is up. I never saw the pattern until now but you definitely do!" He smirked at her, apparently delighted to have discovered something which made her nervy. He proceeded to list off numerous occasions when she had been jumpy for no real reason. He didn't buy her attempts to defend herself either - being mind-linked made him impossible to lie or even exaggerate to. He had the room in stitches before he was half-finished, and when he finally stopped Lancer was sitting in the exact same pouting pose Jazz had exhibited moments prior. KC was glad the attention was off her and adjusted her dress on the sly. It kept riding up around her knees, and was cutting off the circulation to the entire lower half of her body.

"See how undignified and unpleasant that looks Jazz?" Rodi said, imitating his mate and grinning at her.

"I'm staying out of this man. I don't intend on dying this evening! I've got plans!" Jazz said.

"Really? Do tell!" Rodimus said, but he hardly listened as Jazz embarrassed KC with his plans for a romantic evening with a lovely lady.

She's right, Lancer, Rodimus sent seriously to his mate. What bothers you about the moon? His sending was nothing if not open-minded and compassionate, but he couldn't hide his confusion. Unicron had been a major headache but Rodimus couldn't imagine what would bother his feisty mate about it now. It wasn't even as though Unicron had caused Rodimus any lasting trauma: the Matrix had made quick work of the Planet-eater for him.

Lancer had no answer for him since she wasn't sure herself. All she could send to him was confusion, irritation anyone had even noticed, and a vague but real dislike for the moon. As she saw it, the moon bothered her, and she shouldn't have to look at it if she didn't want to without anyone making a federal case out of it. Rodi found her defensiveness amusing.

So did the others. They all had a delightful time at her expense - acting down-right thrilled to have something they could safely pick on her for. Magnus divided his attention between teasing Lancer about her fear of the moon, and KC about her staring problem.

The others were quick to join him and KC finally exploded. "What is this? Haze KC night? First I get dragged out of an important project - literally! I get wrapped up in this..this...get up! Rodi makes a federal issue out of it, and now even MAGNUS is TEASING me! CUT IT OUT!"

The room was silent for a second and then the applause began. Various cheers of "Finally!" and "ENCORE" made KC flush again with frustration.

Lancer's "You have learned well, Grasshopper," earned the assassin a frigid stare. Lancer grinned, pleased.

"At last the girl shows some spine," Rodimus said with satisfaction.

"You guys are impossible you know."

"The lady's always had spine, Rodi." Jazz said.

"Oh, I know she's had it. She just never shows it. Bad habit KC. We need you to speak your mind. You're getting better doing it with me, but I still have a hard time picturing you telling Marissa or Magnus they've got their heads up their ass while on duty."

"They're my superiors." KC mumbled.

"On the council there's no such thing," Rodimus said, as Marissa nodded in agreement. "I expect you to tell Op to stick it when he deserves it, and believe me, he DOES deserve it now and then."

"Not," Lancer said dryly, "That his partner doesn't on a frequent basis."

"You know, if I didn't know better, I'd say you were out to get me Lady Assassin. That's two I owe you from the last ten minutes."

"Now why would I be out to get you just because you are being a jerk to poor KC? After all, you only called her a salmon in sequins. What's the matter with that? It's not as if you were ever expected to be diplomatic about anything! You're just an Autobot Commander after all, so who needs manners? Right?" Lancer said sweetly, the very picture of wifely support and understanding.

Rodimus grinned at her. "At least I'm not afraid of the moon!" he said.

Lancer's sweet smile didn't falter, "You're a dead man, my love," she purred.

"Man, its shameless the way you two flirt!" Jazz said.

X

X

X

The next few days were a real trial for Lancer. She still had regular therapy appointments to attend for her shoulder. After those and a brief, unauthorized workout, she would head off to meet Elita with the latest design specs on their new training facility. These meetings were usually followed by another fitting with Hoist and Pipes of the proto-type Exo-suit they were trying to design to her specifications. All three of them were getting frustrated. She wanted full-human sensitivity, flexibility and range of motion. They were having a hard time understanding what that really meant, especially the sensitivity. The suit was to send electrical impulses through sensors that would mimic her own nerves. So many jolts from this kind of sensor would kill a normal human but for Lancer it wasn't enough. She was having a hard time convincing them she could take it, and an equally hard time convincing them that there weren't more than enough sensors already.

The thing already had three times the amount of a normal Autobot's sensory system. An actual Autobot wouldn't have had enough room internally for this many because they needed the space for memory and personality storage. Lancer had no need for such things - what she needed was a suit that didn't make her feel cut off from the world. She (and Rodimus) were just now becoming aware of how much stress this difference had put him through, and began to wonder if a substantial part of his recent depression hadn't been sensory deprivation. All Lancer knew was that she couldn't stand to have the suit on for more than half an hour, and felt sorry for her mate for the days and weeks on end he was trapped in his own body.

Before, during, and after all of this, she cared for Edana as best she could. Edana was usually very calm and relaxed - eating and sleeping regularly no matter where her mother deposited her, but every now and then she would cry for no apparent reason. Lancer always went through the usual checklist when the baby got fussy, but if it wasn't hunger, wetness, or just a need for a little love, then it always made Lancer fearful. Edana was empathic, and Lancer never knew if the tears were just baby-crankiness, or if Edana was picking up on someone else's powerful emotions. At least Jordan's reassurances had proved true - general irritation, frustration, and anger didn't disturb the baby. She slept through even Lancer's most annoyed sessions with Hoist and Pipes. It took something extraordinary to bother the baby, although it didn't worry Lancer less when she fussed.

And just for added spice, everyone on the council decided to pick on her about the bloody moon.

Lancer didn't know who told Optimus and Elita about her paranoia, but when even Optimus simply had to say something about it, she vowed to kill the culprit when she found them. Of course, that probably meant leaving her daughter a partial orphan......

To top it off, they had reason to be teasing her, which made it worst of all.

Somehow, Lancer would have thought that calling attention to this nervousness would have made it easier to shake off or at least control. It didn't. She became acutely aware of Unicorn even before the disembodied head rose fully over the horizon. She hated it, really hated it, and it wasn't Rodi's memories either. It was an active, searing loathing for the moon as it was currently, not some echo from her mate's past. Of course, the more she tried to ignore it, the more obsessed she became, and the more she tried to hide her hate (and fear! FEAR?!) the more obvious it got - much to the amusement of those around her. After a few days of teasing, Rodimus actually started to worry. He had hoped needling her would make her see how silly it was to worry about a dead moon, but he was also privy to her very real emotions. He was afraid she was developing a real phobia, and that it would affect her health and judgment.

She growled at it on the way to a meeting of the full council.

She got up in the middle of the night to shut the blinds when only a quarter of the thing was visible through the window. She was so bothered by it Rodimus actually felt her body temperature drop. Her confusion and frustration had her trembling in his arms for almost an hour and he held her like a child until she fell back to sleep.

The next day, he took her out for a drive to help her get her mind off of things. When she was relaxed and laughing at his antics he decided to test her fears and prove to her she really wasn't sensing anything real. He hid his intentions from her and pulled out into an open area where the moon was visible. She fanged out immediately and violently - the tips of her horns scrapping the roof of his cab with an ear-bending screech. The thing that bothered him the most about it later was she'd been looking AWAY from the moon when she'd lost it. Maybe she'd caught a glimpse in the mirror...but she was too anxious later to remember clearly, not to mention furious with him. They fought about it for hours.

The final straw came when she was alone with Elita and Edana, and went full-berserker when she thought the moon was "looking at the baby." Rodimus had to run out of a conference with Optimus and Jazz to calm her down. She had blasted her way into a ventilation shaft with Edana and huddled there, snarling, and fending off Elita with her powers. Elita was almost as upset as Lancer by that point, although only a slight change of her quiet voice gave it away. Rodimus was forced to go human and crawl in after Lancer before she would surrender the shrieking infant or come out herself.

Elita agreed to keep quiet about it so none of the others slowed down their teasing, but it was a long, sleepless night for Rodimus while he tried to get something coherent out of Lancer. For a long while, all he received were growls, and flashes of her possession. When she finally came back to herself, she clung to him and cried. Rodimus wished the Maelstrom were still in orbit so he could ask Claudia or even Kain what was wrong with her. He was desperate for a solution.

X

X

X

"What's the matter with you?" Magnus said, his voice hovering around the edge of threatening. "Did you forget to recharge again?" The City Commander had come into Rodi's office with a massive list of ships and their assumed cargoes and destinations. He had spent the last two days looking for anomalies and was there to report his findings to Rodimus, who would decide what looked suspicious enough to move on. It was a tedious, exacting job which required Rodi's full attention, so Magnus was less than pleased to see the young Prime sitting with his head in his hands.

"No, I didn't forget to recharge," Rodimus growled, even more testily than usual. "I just didn't get the chance," he muttered under his breath.

Magnus glared at him. "What's your excuse this time?" he snapped, and then caught himself. Something was really wrong if Rodimus wasn't even trying to hide or deny how tired he was. The boy looked as rotten as an Autobot could. "Rodi? What's wrong?"

"I wish I knew Magnus! You'd think being mentally linked with someone would give you all the answers to understanding them, but it doesn't!"

"Something's wrong with Lancer?" Magnus asked, with a good bit more compassion than a few minutes ago.

Rodi paused, and nodded. "She's driving me crazy!" he exclaimed.

Magnus smiled. "They are rather good at that, aren't they?"

Rodimus returned the smile weakly, and nodded. He went on a little more calmly.

"It's this business with the moon. Oh! Quit smirking! I'm serious. She went completely ballistic on poor Elita yesterday. Fanged out and holed herself up with the baby for almost a half an hour. It's not a joke anymore! I can't decide whether she's losing it or if there's really something there to worry about."

Magnus looked at him as gravely as he could manage, although there was still a desire to laugh lurking behind his serious face. "All this over the moon? Come on Rodimus. What could be bothering her?"

"I don't know. I do know its getting worse. Last night she was obsessing over Edana and her own possession, that's all I DO know."

"Her possession?" Magnus asked with concern, all trace of amusement destroyed. "Why would Unicron make her think of that?" He shuddered. "I can see why she's so afraid. That was one of the most horrible things I've ever seen anyone suffer through."

Rodimus looked at him in surprise, and Magnus realized belatedly that Rodi still didn't know the Maelstrom crew had shared those video-logs with them.

"What do you mean you've seen it?" Rodimus said, in a cold tone that even Magnus knew better than to try to defy.

He sighed. "When you were...separated, and getting so sick. Well, you know Optimus got in touch with her friends...they ...they sent us the tapes of her when she was possessed. You have to understand, Rodimus, you were dying and we were desperate. Optimus asked them to help us understand why she might have left, what she was so afraid of. They sent us those files." Magnus coughed uncomfortably. "They, um, cleared up a lot. After I saw them, I was afraid too. How do you fight an enemy inside your own head? I thought she was very courageous for enduring it."

Rodimus frowned across the desk at Magnus where the City Commander shifted guiltily in his seat and tried to be angry. He couldn't quite manage it though. The invasion of his and Lancer's privacy during this time period was something he'd been angry about a long time, but he was getting tired of holding that particular grudge. It was done with. One more piece of news, long after the fact, wasn't going to change anything. Besides, he had more immediate concerns.

"I wish she'd get over it. I think it would end this whole mess," he said, meaning more than just the paranoia over Unicron.

Magnus knew what his friend meant. Lancer was still actively searching for a means to separate their minds. She consulted telepaths, empaths - anyone she thought might have the slightest idea. Magnus also knew that while Rodimus cooperated, it hurt him deeply everytime. The City Commander said nothing. He didn't know how to help or what to say. He thought of how quickly and smoothly he and Marissa had gone from co-workers, to friends, to lovers. The time he spent with her was always so relaxed and pleasant - even when they were arguing they were at home with each other. He couldn't imagine loving and living with someone with this constant, painful barrier between them. He felt sorry for both of them but his expertise was only with physical warfare - these conflicts of the soul were unknown territory.

Demonic possessions, mental links...such things stretched painfully at his imagination. He liked the reality he could touch, and while he didn't deny such things existed, he wanted no part of them. Even the Matrix came a little too close to this sort of spiritual contact for his comfort. Maybe that was why it hadn't chosen him. He knew that it was bonded to his leaders on a far more personal, intimate level than it had bonded with him when he'd had it. It was a living, speaking thing to them, whispering into their minds when they needed its help. He shuddered. The very idea gave him the surges and he was only too glad he hadn't been sensitive to such whisperings. His mind was his own, thank you very much, and as much as he adored Marissa he was just as glad not to know her thoughts. It seemed an atrocious invasion of privacy. The link with Lancer certainly didn't seem to be doing Rodimus any good either.

Rodimus went on. "I was thinking, maybe I should take her up there...to prove to her that Unicron is really dead. I'm hoping if she sees that for herself she'll quit being so paranoid."

"You don't think there's a chance she's right, do you?"

Rodimus shrugged. "I doubt it but then I haven't been up there since I opened the Matrix on him. She won't accept me saying he's really dead because she knows I haven't checked personally."

Magnus chuckled. "She certainly sounds pretty paranoid. When do we leave?"

"We?" Rodimus asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Sure. If she's right, you'll need backup, and if she's wrong....well."

"If she's wrong you want to be there to rub it in! Optimus is right. Marissa and I have corrupted you," Rodi said, pretending to be disappointed.

"You have no idea," Magnus said.

X  
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X

Rodimus and Lancer would get a better idea the next day when he showed up at the shuttle with Marissa, KC, and Jazz in tow. Lancer fumed silently, but recognized overwhelming odds when she saw them and didn't protest the herd. She knew the more she fussed, the more they would pick on her. They filed into the shuttle - the Autobots showing at least some concern for things by being in robot form, and the humans in standard exo-suits for the airless environment on the moon. It was KC's first foray into the unknown since her powers had struck and Lancer could tell her student was nervous. She kept looking at the hands of her exo-suit as if expecting them to warp out of shape on their own. Lancer would have liked to comfort the young metal shaper but was too busy trying to keep her own emotions under control.

Rodimus had the Matrix as a precaution and while she took some small comfort in that, even Rodi didn't know if it would still be effective now that it was mostly empty. He really didn't understand why it had worked in the first place and Lancer took a lot of her irritation out on him, mentally chastising him and all of his predecessors for not bothering to figure out their own bloody Matrix. He sighed internally, agreeing, but also demanding to know what she expected him to do about it now. He couldn't get angry with her though - he knew she was utterly terrified.

Jazz and the others politely pretended to be oblivious to all this mental bickering. The specialist was trying to impress KC with his piloting skills, a fact the nervous scientist was nicely oblivious to. Magnus and Marissa seemed a little more aware of how serious this was, at least for Lancer, and refrained from teasing her for once. They were mostly silent, talking only briefly to each other now and then.

When Rodimus finally sighed and turned away from his mate, rubbing his temples, Marissa thought she might be able to help Lancer relax. Maybe she just needed to hear support from someone other than her mate. The mutant was staring obsessively towards their destination and Marissa came up behind her and put a hand on her arm. Lancer leapt away and whirled on Marissa, snarling. Marissa forced herself not to jump although she knew she had come within a hair of being blasted to death by the edgy mutant.

"Lancer!" Rodimus said sharply when she didn't relax immediately but continued to glare at Marissa with glowing, wild eyes. Lancer looked at Rodi as if she didn't know him, but she did suddenly relax a little. The light faded most of the way.

"Sorry Marissa," she whispered.

"Is there anything I can do?" Marissa asked.

Lancer shook her head and turned back towards the window. It was as if there was some kind of irritating noise, buzzing at the back of her mind, that she was growing ever more aware of as time passed. It scratched and crawled through her consciousness - aggravating the old "scars" left by her possession - and the closer they got to Unicron, the more tangible the sensation became. Even Rodimus was starting to really feel it for himself as they got nearer and he was startled to remember it faintly from that first, brief confrontation. He remembered thinking vaguely then that the Matrix kept that feeling at bay...but now the Matrix was drained, and the "noise" was coming through. He paced.

Magnus and Jazz exchanged glances. They knew Rodi well enough to know that if they could sense him being nervous at all, then it was very serious. They just didn't know if he was genuinely afraid or if he was just picking up on Lancer's mood.

Jazz used it as an excuse to chatter inanely at KC and do some silly loops in an attempt to bring his leader back to reality. He got a rather vicious reprimand to quit playing and just fly the damned ship. At least it proved that Rodimus was still with them and paying attention, unlike Lancer who didn't respond at all. It also showed how upset Rodi was though, and even KC stopped worrying about her powers and started worrying about her friends.

Continued in Part B: 


	2. Chapter 2

Maelstrom Chapter 24  
Unicron PART B 

Author's note: This story is part of a LONG series called Maelstrom. It is strictly Gen. 1 - sorry, but that was all that was out when I started writing back in the late 1980's. It began as a fan-publication so the first chapters are in the form of a comic book! If you have not read the nine original **Maelstrom Comics** and the preceding text stories, I strongly suggest you do. This is a complex universe. They can be found at http// illmatar. deviantart. com (I have put double spaces between the URL here or FF . Net eats the link.) The comics and art which accompanies this series are there...and believe me I am a better artist than writer.

This scene contains strong language and Dubious Humor. IT CONTAINS SOME MAJOR DEVELOPMENTS BETWEEN CHARACTERS BUT IS GENERALLY A FLUFF SCENE.

**Most chapters of this series contain strong language and violence. Rated M for adult themes! Really! Transformers characters belong to Hasbro. Critiques adored!**

Maelstrom Chapter 25 Unicron: PART B

Continued from Unicron Part A!

Marissa stood next to Lancer and watched her face, although she didn't try touching her again. Even through the exo-suit's thick glass, Marissa could see the sweat on Lancer's forehead. The EDC Captain didn't like that cold, set stare one little bit. She looked ahead through the window and felt a chill. They were nearly there, and Unicron's face filled the entire view. His eyeless sockets seemed to stare into her soul and she shuddered. For a brief second, it was almost as if something cold and eely had slithered against her neck, and she felt the hairs stand up all over her body. She had a sudden desire to scream but the feeling passed quickly, and she swore internally at herself. It wouldn't do to let Lancer's fear rub off on her and cloud her judgment. Still, Marissa couldn't deny the cold sweat which began running down her own back, chilling her. Magnus gave her a concerned glance and she smiled at him, reassured, and glad he was there. Apparently, he wasn't feeling a thing, and she laughed at her own delusions.

Jazz flew the shuttle flawlessly into Unicron's shattered right eye - not even brushing the shards as he did. It was a feat he could have rightfully boasted about but for some reason he didn't. It was very unusual that he would squander a chance to show off for KC. The shuttle touched down with a hollow thud, and Rodimus silently headed for the door. His noiseless feet were something the others thought they had gotten used to, but now it was eerily like he was a mere ghost - faint and insubstantial. Lancer's gliding walk as she followed him didn't help, and the others were somehow surprised (and grateful) to find their own feet still made noise, at least until they got into the airless environment within Unicron's shattered skull. It was dark, all the light coming from their headlights, and Lancer's blazing eyes. The shadows seemed to have a life of their own as the visitors turned to scan their environment. Unicron's skull was mangled. There was debris from the Quint ship they had entered with so many years ago, plus all the damage caused by the Matrix and years of decay in space.

"Nothing could survive up here!" Magnus said. "Even if Unicron survived the Matrix's initial assault, he couldn't possible have lasted this long without power!"

No one answered him. For some reason his voice sounded thin and far away and his perfectly logical remarks seemed divorced from all sense and reality. The place was alive with malice.

Jazz suffered a crushing moment of panic. Am I real? he thought hysterically. Do I exist? He had never felt so cold and weightless before and he gasped when Magnus' solid hand touched his arm in concern. For an insane instant, the Specialist was amazed that hand didn't pass right through him.

"What's wrong?" Magnus asked.

How could he explain? He couldn't just come out and tell Mr. Down-to -Earth that he thought he wasn't real, now could he? "Nothing," Jazz said. He glared at Magnus for seeming so unaffected.

KC was white as a sheet, Marissa was turning rapidly from side to side -all her weapons out and ready to fire. Rodimus stood very still - his head cocked as if listening, and Lancer.... Well, Lancer had apparently left her fear behind and was now obviously stalking. What she was stalking, Jazz couldn't say, but he knew a hunt when he saw one. She was growling and furious, and Jazz was sure he could hear the faint thump of her tail within her exo-suit through the open channel they were keeping with each other.

For a long, silent moment they stood there in sort of a loose circle, backs to each other, and waiting.

Nothing happened.

"Well," Magnus said. "Obviously this was a waste of time and fuel." He seemed rather annoyed.

Lancer stiffened.

All hell broke loose.

One of the huge, tortured ceiling panels pulled free without warning - falling straight for Rodimus. It might have seemed a coincidence save for the mangled wires which rose to wrap his legs. He swore, and tried to pull free but there wasn't time. Almost instantly, a huge spur of the floor rose to meet the falling panel, and the surrounding metal flowed over and surrounded the moving wires. The panel fell to one side, deflected, and they turned to see KC, pale and sweating, fighting a war of wills with the consciousness in the skull.

There was a roar of outrage, as Unicron was forced to surrender control of his little remaining body to a tiny, but determined young mutant, who smoothed the twisted walls into a single, protective bubble.

"Well," Rodimus said, "That was interesting. Thanks KC! I guess the big guy doesn't like me much for some reason." He smiled proudly at her, and even Lancer seemed to take notice of her student's achievement.

KC nodded, and smiled triumphantly, for the first time feeling like she truly had something to contribute. She frowned in concentration as Unicron tried once more to assert his will, but she easily defied him, and went on to spread her influence through the rest of his head. He was trapped.

They all looked at each other, still in a defensive circle, within the now smooth and shining dome of KC's shaping. The area brightened, reflecting their lights around itself until it seemed almost like daylight. There was a little nervous laughter - they couldn't quite believe that not only was Unicron still active, but that they'd defeated him so quickly, and with such little effort. Lancer didn't laugh. They stood listening to the last, faint thuds of Unicron's resistance. Then silence fell.

"What do we do now, Rodimus?" Marissa asked.

"I don't know. I'm not sure there's anything we can do! Even if KC destroys the last of his memory circuits, I'm not certain we'll be rid of him. Remember Starscream? I'd almost rather we kept Unicron's soul trapped here than send him wandering around at whim."

"He's a demon." Lancer snarled, her words nearly unintelligible. She was still glaring all around her, as if hunting for a target. Any target.

Rodimus looked sadly at his enraged mate. "I think you may be right," he said, "and I'm sorry for doubting you."

Then the screaming started.

KC was the first to be assaulted. She shrieked once in horror, although the others couldn't see a thing. The terrified young woman resisted instinctively, holding that which was not herself OUT! She held on to her mind out of the sheerest certainty that if Unicron possessed her and her powers he would destroy (Jazz!) all of Cybertron. She fought successfully but was knocked unconscious by the exertion within seconds, and the others braced for a renewed physical attack. Jazz ran to protect her, but Unicron had given up his last ties to his physical form. One by one he ran himself over their minds; probing for weaknesses. Jazz cried out in horror as he felt the evil presence test the edges of his soul. He panicked, fearing more for KC's safety than his own. While he was focusing on protecting her precious life, he felt Unicron suddenly shrink away, and Jazz knelt in stunned confusion over the unconscious scientist.  
Then Marissa screamed uncontrollably. It was the same presence she'd felt on approach, only far more vivid and penetrating this time. She shrieked and fought for her identity, reminding herself of her own name over and over until the slimy presence moved on. She sobbed and felt Magnus cradling her in his huge hands. He called to her in confusion - having no idea what was happening to everyone but she couldn't answer. He had his weapon drawn, and towered defensively over her and Jazz, but she couldn't draw breath to tell him his gun was useless.

Rodimus felt Unicron brush by him and draw back as if singed. There was a flare from the Matrix, and Rodi knew it had once again protected him. He moved, mentally and physically towards his enraged mate, just as Unicron struck at her shields. The results were cataclysmic but not entirely in the way Rodimus feared.

The touch of Unicron's essence against her own left Lancer with no doubts that he was of the same breed as the entity which had possessed her. It also left her with nothing but rage. NOT AGAIN! she roared as he probed hopefully at her scarred core. She fought, as she had been too frightened to fight the first demon and found he retreated at once, unable to met the slightest resistance. She snarled in disgust at the little strength he could bring to bear against her, realizing that if she hadn't been too frightened of the first entity to resist at all, she probably could have defeated it too. She didn't even need Rodimus' considerable strength and support to pursue Unicron's frightened little soul as he shrank from her fury. She realized she could "see" his essence as a faint gleam of energy and began to hound it - blasting at the elusive sprite to disrupt its cohesion. She was causing considerable damage to the head - a fact she seemed very unconcerned about - in spite of the fact they were all still IN it. Not even Rodi could dissuade her as she took out all the years of pain on her possessor's cousin. She came closer with each shot and the sprite took refuge as quickly as it could.

Magnus stared around him in confusion. The presence the others felt was barely discernible to him and he tended to dismiss it. His reality-based outlook tended to make him less sensitive than the others to such things - which made him the least likely host. However, those who were even slightly more used to thinking in such terms had a better idea how to defend themselves and Magnus' hardened shields also proved to be the most brittle.

When Unicron attacked, Magnus didn't feel a thing. The collision against his mind was so desperate and so sudden it shattered any and all resistance. Without warning, Magnus suddenly found himself a prisoner in his own mind, with Unicron growing fat and strong off of his terror and in complete control of the City Commander's powerful body.

"Unicron has Magnus!" Rodimus shouted in horror. Lancer had seen the entity enter Magnus' head but Rodimus didn't need that to know what had happened. For one thing, Magnus didn't laugh that much. For another, even Magnus' face didn't look like his own anymore - not with that leering, sadist grin on it. Plus, there was the fact that Unicron immediately drove that huge body straight towards Rodimus, still intent on destroying the one who had destroyed him.

Marissa screamed.

"MAGNUS FIGHT HIM!" Lancer roared. "HE CAN'T MEET ANY RESISTANCE! HE'S JUST A PETTY LITTLE IMP! IT'S YOUR BODY!! COMMAND IT!"

"I DON'T THINK HE CAN HEAR YOU, LANCER!" Rodimus shouted. He had chosen to let Unicron grapple with him and was trying to restrain those powerful limbs. At least it kept Magnus' body away from the others, but Rodimus wasn't having an easy time of it. He didn't want to use any crippling tactics on his friend if he could help it, and he knew that even mere physical pain might strengthen Unicron's power. If Unicron grew too strong, he might embed himself permanently in Magnus' mind, or even destroy Magnus' defenseless soul. Unfortunately, that left Rodimus in a contest of pure strength against a body more powerful than his own, driven by a mind that certainly had no reservations about hurting HIM. He was forced to retreat, and retreat again.

"MAGNUS! LANCER IS RIGHT! YOU NEED TO FIGHT BACK! YOU CAN DO IT!" Rodimus cried, locking optics with the form he was struggling with. He saw nothing of his friend in those chilling optics and felt despair. Unicron laughed, and Rodimus knew he had just made the creature stronger.

"You can not free him!" Unicron hissed. "You can not defeat me! I am a God! I am the Chaos Bringer! I am the Eater of Worlds!"

"YOU ARE A MISERABLE LITTLE PARASITE!" Lancer shrieked. "AND MAGNUS' SOUL IS GREATER THAN YOURS! AND SO WAS MINE, IF ONLY I'D BELIEVED IT!"

For an instant, Unicron's confidence faltered. SHE KNEW. She was right, and if his host resisted he knew she would stop at nothing until she destroyed him utterly. Unicron had sensed the scars in Lancer's mind - he had thought they might provide him an easy way in. The strength of her rebuttal had proved a nasty shock, in fact all of these tiny creatures had resisted him on instinct, or in her case, painfully strong awareness of invasion. He cursed whichever of his brethren which had taught her so well. And then there was that damned, painful Matrix - no longer as strong as it had been, but then neither was he. Denied the food of the despair he had caused so well in his massive body, Unicron was barely existent now - but there was one small hope. His host didn't know that.

Magnus believed the myths Unicron had surrounded himself with. Invincible. All-powerful. God of Evil. What hope did one Transformer, the Transformer who didn't understand such things, the Transformer who knew nothing of the spiritual, stand against something like Unicron? Easy enough for Rodimus and Lancer to tell him to resist. Resist how? He didn't carry the Matrix! He didn't have a mental link with his mate! Unicron was in him! IN HIM! In him where Magnus had never wanted anything! Not the Matrix! Not even Marissa! Unicron made sure his mental presence appeared every bit as huge and overwhelming as his physical one had seemed - something Magnus would be a fool to even try to resist. Omnipresent. Undefeatable, and growing stronger with each passing second as Magnus' own fear gave the monster strength.

Magnus shrank within himself, trying hopelessly to crawl away from the slimy, clammy mental tentacles which engulfed and wormed their way deeper into his mind. He couldn't escape -where was there to go? He couldn't leave his own body and knew Unicron wouldn't let him die. Unicron rifled his memory core - exposing all the secrets, all the hopes, all the hidden flaws and errors, dreams and desires. The Planet Eater made mockery of everything he saw, even as he contaminated and penetrated what he found. The humiliation and despair this caused was all to Unicron's pleasure and power.

The orderly formations of Ultra Magnus' mental landscape fell into chaos one after the other like so many dominoes.

leave me alone Magnus' mind whimpered, but the thought had no real hope or strength behind it. It was what he wanted, but he didn't expect Unicron to listen. As a result, Unicron didn't. Instead, he raped his way further into Magnus' subconscious. The violation was almost more than Magnus' sanity could bear. The City Commander had always cultivated self-control. He had been proud that no matter how chaotic events around him became, that he could stay centered within himself and be an anchor for those around him. Now that control had been savagely stripped away and he had no idea how to get it back. He had never lost it before. He heard Rodi's orders to fight back. He heard Lancer's desperate advice but his idea of fighting was grounded in the physical. The concept that his own will might be a match for a being as huge (seeming) and all-powerful (says who?) as Unicron was so ludicrous their words made no sense to him. He thought he was missing the point, and wasn't surprised - when it came to such things he usually did. Unicron was only too glad to give such thoughts a boost.

You are easy pickings little Autobot. Even the fleshlings could resist better than you. Your body is big but your mind is weak and slow. That's why I chose you. I can do anything I want to you; I can go anywhere I want within your mind! You can do nothing! Nothing! You are mine! Mine to use until I am ready to discard you! Your body is mine. Your mind is mine! Your soul is mine!

Magnus screamed within himself - a scream like he had never uttered. Never in his millenias of existence had anything seemed so undefeatable and horrifying. Unicron crawled through him and ate away at him like squirming maggots by randomly opening and chewing into pockets of memory and thought. Each time, the Planet Eater would belittle and corrupt what he found and then suckle off the shame and horror. Before long, he had Magnus recoiling in revulsion from himself as well as Unicron. Even Magnus' fondest memories became objects of ridicule and scorn. Victories on the battle field? So? They couldn't help him here. Intimate moments with Marissa? Unicron found them incredibly amusing, although for some reason the monster didn't linger long there, in spite of the incredible violation Magnus felt at having those memories exposed and contaminated. It was almost as if they caused Unicron some kind of pain.....but no. That wasn't possible. Magnus surrendered anew to terror, those thoughts overrun by a fresh assault on Unicron's part.

All of this took place within seconds, a fact Lancer was violently aware of. She knew how quickly and absolutely such creatures could infiltrate every part of your being and was desperate to free Magnus before too much damage was done. She knew how much it hurt and she knew the helpless fear Unicron would be encouraging. Rodimus, concerned though he was for his friend's spirit, had less and less room for thought on how to free him. The younger Prime was too busy trying to stay alive against the being who probably hated him more than any other in the universe.

Marissa was beyond horrified. She remembered the revolting touch of Unicron's spirit and couldn't imagine how much worse it would be for Magnus. The only person she'd ever known who'd gone through anything similar was Lancer - who remained so traumatized that even the mental link and Rodimus' powerful love weren't enough to help her get over it. The EDC Captain cradled Mayhem's head, trying to protect or wake the unconscious mutant. If KC's powers could freeze Magnus' body in place maybe Unicron wouldn't want it anymore. KC remained pale and unresponsive, and Marissa's hands shook with frustrated energy at being unable to help her friends help her lover. In a sudden shock, she realized she might lose him, and her heart screamed a denial her voice couldn't begin to match. She watched Rodimus ducking blow after blow, then grabbing those flailing arms and trying to contain Magnus' possessed body. It was plain he was trying not to hurt his friend, but Marissa realized how repugnant she found that familiar form now that it wasn't Magnus in command of it. She felt cold hatred run through her. If they couldn't free Magnus from that beast, she would kill his body herself. It was an abomination. Then she shook herself. Magnus wasn't gone yet. He was still in there somewhere, and she knew with the shock of first, conscious clarity, that she loved him and wasn't going to give him up for anything. Not for Unicron, not for her parents, not for some petty little thing like species differences. Not for anything.

Unicron drew on his host's ever increasing fear like a leech, sucked the glorious sustenance into himself, and delighted with his choice in host; as far as he knew Magnus' powerful body was a match for any here and the City Commander's strong mind would provide equally strong terror for Unicron to feed off of for a long time. He could use that power until Magnus' soul expired, and then find another host. Perhaps Metroplex would be a good start for once again fostering the terror Unicron needed to survive. Nothing could match his old form of course, but then it wasn't often any wandering sprite happened upon a consciousless body-shell of ANY size just waiting for someone to take it over. He'd been able to grow bloated off the despair of entire worlds then and had delighted in being able to feed his physical and non-corporal hungers in one act of utter devastation. Maybe he could find a way to build and inhabit such a body again. All things were possible in the physical world, that was its attraction.

In a way though, this a was more intimate, sweeter entrance into the corporal realm. Unicron's kind often desired to enter the physical world. Randomly floating through world after world, and scavenging the emotional energy which could sustain them was a precarious existence. Individual sprites all had certain "frequencies" of emotion that they could "digest", and of course, they all had preferences. Sometimes they would get lucky and find a person or group of people projecting those preferred emotions strongly. Before he'd found his first body, Unicron had often lingered around planets at war or wherever he could find a quantity of fear and suffering, but even then he hadn't always fed well. Some people's emotions didn't project much and many times the pain they did project was tainted by other things like courage or love - emotions Unicron found painfully distasteful. Like others of his kind, Unicron had tried to influence the people he fed off of to project what he wanted more strongly, but again nothing was sure - some people simply weren't sensitive to the faint prods he could give, while others felt too much and committed suicide (a delicious treat, but too quick for a sustained feeding.)

Even when he'd found a perfect host to linger near for their entire lifetime, the mortal in question always died eventually, leaving Unicron to hunt randomly again - ever fearful he would starve out of existence before he found sustenance. That was why all of his kind, even those that fed off of more "positive" emotions longed for a route into the physical realm - they could influence the emotions around them more directly from there. Doorways into the physical were rare though - even more rare than a sustained feeding - which was why Unicron was surprised by the white-eyed woman. He could feel the same doorway to her soul her possessor had used, and knew one of his own had used her as a host. Unfortunately, she now guarded that doorway with unprecedented vigilance. Unicron smiled to himself as another wave of fear from Magnus flooded him with pleasure and strength. Tornatron's enormous creation had inspired Unicron to try a meld. Finding that soulless body in space had been unbelievable good luck. It had been so easy to take - a completely wide-open door to the corporal world unlike any that had ever existed before. but Unicron had to admit that Lancer's possessor had had a good idea. True, it had been harder possessing Magnus, but now he had an internal supply of emotional energy he could cultivate for as long as it suited him.

He could also see to it he had VERY personal revenge on the upstart Autobot who had destroyed his perfect body.

Magnus/Unicron lashed out at Rodimus again with vengeful fury. Rodi dodged and grappled with his possessed friend again. He was getting tired and was only thankful that while Magnus was a skilled fighter, Unicron seemed to have little idea of how to use that body effectively. It was still a strong form though, and Rodimus realized with despair Unicron was starting to haphazardly use tactics they had all seen Magnus use many times. The demon was obviously plundering the City Commander's knowledge as the fight went on. Lancer roared in blind fury. She knew how that felt, and knew that if Unicron did manage to hurt Rodimus that the demon would use Magnus' own guilt to bind himself deeper into the Autobot's soul.

She was only too right. Laughing, Unicron continued to probe Magnus' soul - molesting it and torturing it. When Unicron actually managed to make contact with the tiring Prime the blow crumpled the metal along the side of Rodi's chest. Magnus' soul shuddered with guilt and terror that Rodimus might actually be killed. He knew Rodimus was holding back for his sake, and wished with all his being that his friend would just use one of those deadly assassin's moves to destroy his body and free his soul. He didn't think there was any chance they could save him, (it never occurred to him he might have the power to save himself) and Magnus didn't want Rodimus to risk be killed (giving Unicron a better shot at others....NO! Don't think about her!)

Unicron sensed the rush from that brief, sickening fear but wasn't sure of the cause. It was too delicious to ignore though. He had been concentrating on destroying Rodimus, but now devoted more of his attention on tracking down the source that succulent dismay. The entity plundered the Autobot's memories and emotions, searching for the choicest terrors, the most nourishing fears. There were few enough of those - Magnus had little concern for physical harm or even death, but the ones that were there were deep, rich and delicious... mental possession being one of them. Unicron laughed in delight that was nearly orgasmic. One fear, however, one fear stood out like a shining, luscious clot in Magnus' soul - and what a delightfully fragile form it was wrapped in! Unicron had no doubt that this was the horror he had sensed, that this was the one fear that would make Magnus his for eternity if only he could bring it about. The power it was generating already was unbelievable! Magnus' thoughts went completely incoherent with panic the instant Unicron tracked the dread down. The guilt, dismay, and sense of failure Magnus felt over attacking Rodimus were multiplied a thousand-fold, and Unicron was positive if he carried out this act then he would have enough power to destroy Rodimus easily. Unicron plunged his "face" into that juicy knot of fear and drew on it like an obscene vampire, even as he guided the body towards its wonderfully delicate source.

Marissa.

Unicron disengaged from Rodimus so suddenly, and with such force that even Rodi's assassin's balance wasn't entirely adequate. He stumbled and lost crucial seconds as Magnus' body moved with unnatural speed towards the City Commander's petrified mate. The body almost glowed with power, but Marissa couldn't bring herself to run from him. She just knelt there, cradling KC in her lap, as Magnus' form lurched recklessly towards her. Lancer was ready to fire but changed her mind about blasting him at the last second. This might be their only chance.

"MAGNUS YOU'D BETTER RESIST OR MARISSA'S HISTORY!" Lancer cried, although she had no intention of letting Unicron hurt her friend. She just wanted Magnus to stand up for himself.

Marissa couldn't speak, but she locked eyes with what had been her mate and mouthed his name. Tears rolled silently down her face.

Magnus' body froze one step from where she sat. Marissa refused to be afraid of him, putting all her love and trust into her gaze with all the fierce determination she could muster.

"I love you ," she whispered into the silence. She knew he was in there. She knew he could hear her, and she knew, with absolute certainty, that those hands raised against her would never come down. All fear left her. He could flatten her without effort but he wouldn't. He loved her.

Magnus' body shuddered. His eyes flickered strangely. Marissa stared into them, almost smiling and waiting for Magnus to get back into control. It was almost as though she were meeting him after a trip.

"NO! YOu CAnNOT RESIsST MEe!" The words seemed to come only partly from Magnus' mouth, the rest whispered their way into the minds of the listeners from the faint, shimmering sprite which circled in and out of his head.

"THE HELL HE CAN'T! KICK HIS ASS MAGNUS!" Lancer thundered - her voice oddly caught between a cheer and a growl.

"Come on Major General," Marissa whispered, feeling no need to shout like Lancer did, "Come back to me."

The shuddering grew worse and suddenly Lancer DID fire, but not directly at Magnus. The instant the sprite lost its hold, she knocked it away from her friend. Not that it mattered. Unicron had lost his host. Magnus sank silently to his knees and then curled up around himself on the floor. Marissa scrambled to his side but she couldn't do much to comfort that enormous robotic form. She wasn't even sure he knew she was there. She called to him, telling him over and over that she loved him, and that they would all be fine. She seemed oblivious to the fact that there were others around them - speaking to her mate in an intimate fashion that might have embarrassed Jazz if it hadn't seemed so necessary and appropriate.

First aid for the soul he thought. The specialist moved closer, and kept trying to stand guard over all of them, although he didn't know if it would do any good. How did he keep ending up in situations his bag of tricks had no influence on? It seemed to be happening more and more these days.

Rodimus put himself between Unicron's faint spark and his friends. It seemed almost wounded - moving and flickering drunkenly away from its victim. He sensed Lancer's determination to vanquish it and shared it, even when the entity vanished into the walls of its head. His mate had never wanted to exterminate anything so badly in her life - she couldn't abide Unicron existence the way some people couldn't abide a spider in their room. She wasn't really afraid of Unicron anymore, but she felt a soul-deep disgust that demanded Unicron's obliteration. Rodimus understood. The Matrix burned in his chest.

"Can you hit it?" he asked Lancer, sensing that she was poised at the edge of beserker fury again, and trying to dissuade her from taking the plunge.

"NO!" she roared. "He's hiding somewhere in the skull! DAMN! I need a direct hit to disrupt a pattern that faint and I can't shoot everything at once!" She stalked the length of the chamber, letting her exo-suit stomp noisily for once as she scanned through the walls for Unicron's cowering spark. She couldn't find him.

Rodimus paused, remembering Unicron's initial destruction. He cursed himself for not making sure Unicron was really dead. He'd assumed his "All powerful, sacred" damned Matrix had taken care of everything. An assumption Magnus was now paying for. Why had the Matrix been effective at all? It was just a crystal. All it did was store the memories and emotions of those that bore it, although when it had been at the height of its power it had been almost a living thing. So if it wasn't the crystal itself, it had to be the lives within it that had hurt Unicron, but they weren't anything unusual either - they were just Autobots.

Frustrated and confused, Rodimus tried to remember exactly what he had felt in those first stunned moments after the Matrix had accepted him. He'd been in such shock it was hard to remember anything clearly. The fight with Galvatron had had him hurt and certain he was about to die - a rather upsetting thing to his younger self. In those days, death was the worst thing he could imagine. His fingers had closed around the Matrix casing, and he'd been flooded with renewing energy and an incredible sense of peace. All hell was breaking loose around him but in that instant he had become incredibly calm. (He'd made up for it later by completely panicking after everything was over and he'd realized he was stuck with the damned thing.) The fact was, he knew upon reflection those emotions couldn't have been his own, although they had seemed entirely natural at the time; in those days it was completely unlike him to be that relaxed under ANY circumstances, let alone when facing down a powerful Decepticon inside of a sapient planet that was trying to destroy his world!

He had opened the Matrix almost unconsciously and watched in hazy satisfaction as its blinding light tore through Unicron's body in all directions. He remembered being vaguely confused by its randomness. It hadn't gone after areas of circuitry he would have said were more vital, but assumed (correctly) it knew more about what it was doing than he did. In fact, now that he thought about it, it seemed more like was Lancer was doing now - hunting and blasting at the soul In the shell, rather than the shell itself. Maybe that was what the Matrix had been trying to do - disrupt the soul of the entity, rather than merely destroying the form. He'd always sensed that the PHYSICAL devastation hadn't been the point - if it had been then any old massive, physical weapon might have done - if they could have found one big enough. That hadn't been his impression though. It was the Matrix, and ONLY the Matrix which would have done it. Why? It was a source of wisdom, not a destructive tool, the home of past leaders who had been dedicated and self-sacrificing enough to deny themselves the release of death for their people....And perhaps that was the answer. That attitude. That much devotion. That much courage. That much love. How could it be anything but poison to a creature that fed off pain and fear?

That was why it couldn't touch Lancer now that she was resisting - she had more to fight for now and, at last, the heart to do it! That was what had freed Magnus too - he might have been afraid initially, but his devotion to Marissa wasn't something Unicron could swallow. It was bigger than worlds.

And the Matrix, well, those caring leaders had made the final sacrifice during the spore-plague, but it still housed his own concern for his people, and Optimus', and if all it needed was a little extra kick, well then, it was nice to have a living, breathing power-cell so near at hand.

"Yes, you can," Rodimus said to his mate, sending her his thoughts, and removing the Matrix from his chest.

She understood what he wanted from her immediately as he knelt down in front of her. She stepped into the circle of his arms and was no longer afraid or even angry. She knew this would work, and concentrated on how much she cared for him. He flooded her with his love for her and without even checking she knew Unicron was desperately seeking some kind of escape. She almost felt sorry for him, that he should fear what she found so comforting.

She put her hands on the crystal and used it to scatter the focus of her power from a single beam to a diffuse glow. It didn't really matter if the light was strong enough to penetrate the metal bubble around them; it was the IDEA, the attitude, that mattered. They were fighting on a mental, spiritual plane - the physical act only helped them focus the real power. And to think it had taken all this time for her to realize that her attitude shaped her own reality. How dense. She felt Rodimus laughing at her in her mind. Well, better late than never.

The light spread. Unicron shrieked hopelessly. It was as simple as that.

Even Magnus felt it when Unicron expired - shriveling like a moth in a bonfire - probably because the large Autobot was now over-sensitized as Lancer had been from her possession. He sobbed once with relief when that soul-rattling vibration that had driven Lancer so wild in recent days suddenly ceased. Lancer felt horribly for him. She knew only too well how filthy and violated he must feel. It was a humbling, confidence-destroying experience, especially for someone who was usually so in control. She hoped the fact that he HAD resisted on his own would help him heal faster than she had, but knew it wasn't going to be easy no matter what. At least he had Marissa.  
Then she stopped herself. They would heal him, of this she had no doubt. If their devotion to each other was enough to defeat Unicron, it was powerful enough to help Ultra Magnus, and if Magnus was strong enough to free himself, then he would surely rally soon. Hell, if even SHE could recover, then there was no real need to fear for Magnus. He would be scarred, but he would be fine eventually.

Lancer suffered a moment of self-realization. She had healed. She had HEALED! All the years of self-doubt, and self-torture were over. She was in control of herself. She always had been. It was just that now she KNEW it! She could let Rodimus in without fear. This epiphany was followed quickly by guilt for all the pain she had put everyone, particularly her soul-mate, through unnecessarily. She flashed a first, brief apology at him, knowing this was not the time for it, but needing to anyway.

You can do penance making sure Magnus doesn't do the same thing. Rodimus sent to her, not that she wasn't already thinking of ways to help their shuddering friend. Lancer felt how torn Rodi was between joy at her recovery, and sick, sick dismay for Magnus. He shared her confidence that Magnus would be fine eventually, but he was disgusted the City Commander had to endure this pain at all. He also felt deeply for Marissa. Having suffered through Lancer's arduous recovery, he was keenly aware of what his friends had ahead of them. He wished their suffering could be erased as easily as the entity which had caused it.

Rodimus checked on Magnus and Jazz before switching to human form to help Marissa, and KC. Jazz was muttering distractedly under his breath about needing to work harder on learning "that little trick." The specialist was in fits over KC, and was frustrated he couldn't just shift down to human size to hold her. Marissa was feeling the same frustration in reverse. In that moment, she almost wished she were an Autobot so she could put her arm over Magnus' shoulder like Jazz and Rodi were. His love for her had saved them both, but now she couldn't even make him feel her presence. Magnus refused to speak to anyone, in fact he hardly seemed aware of them, and she knew the touch of her hands on his metal skin was too faint to penetrate the horror he was reliving. His optics were focused completely inward. They all huddled together as best they could, trying to comfort him and each other until KC came around to open the walls, and let their shuttle head for home.

X

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Getting Magnus aboard proved a feat in and of itself. He didn't follow them of his own accord, although he didn't actively resist either. Rodimus had to return to Autobot form to pull him gently to his feet and guide him by the shoulders into the shuttle, and then into a seat. Magnus made no move to strap himself in - a habit he usually followed compulsively. Watching Rodimus having to wrap the harnesses around Magnus as though he were a child was what finally broke Marissa's iron control. She sobbed convulsively and clung to Lancer when the mutant came to sit with her. Lancer did the best she could to reassure her friend.

"He'll be OK, Marissa. He's tough, and so are we. He'll be fine, because none of us are going to quit until he is. Right?"

Marissa looked up at Lancer, surprised. Something was different about the young mutant - her eyes held a clarity and determination that had never been there before. The EDC Captain had been ready to refute Lancer's statement by saying that since Lancer had never gotten over her possession proved that there was no guarantee that Magnus would. Something in the young woman's face was different though, different enough that it even made its impression on Marissa's distracted mind. Maybe it was the fact that Lancer's voice held no doubt at all. She was absolutely confident in what she said. Marissa looked into those eyes and saw conviction. It was an alien expression on the face of a person who spent her life guarding against the unexpected, and never, ever counting on ANYTHING as certain. Yet Marissa knew Lancer wasn't paying lip service to comfort her.

"Y...You finally came to terms with it didn't you?" Marissa said in disbelief. Oh how she wanted the young woman to say yes....

"Yeah. Took me long enough didn't it?" Lancer said with a wan smile.

Marissa came undone again, but this time with a sort of twisted relief. If someone had asked her that morning, she would have said whatever had been done to Lancer was something Lancer would never recover from. Now she had and it gave Marissa hope.

The hope faded pretty quickly.

Continued in Unicron Part C.


	3. Chapter 3

Maelstrom Chapter 24  
Unicron PART C 

Author's note: This story is part of a LONG series called Maelstrom. It is strictly Gen. 1 - sorry, but that was all that was out when I started writing back in the late 1980's. It began as a fan-publication so the first chapters are in the form of a comic book! If you have not read the nine original **Maelstrom Comics** and the preceding text stories, I strongly suggest you do. This is a complex universe. They can be found at http// illmatar. deviantart. com (I have put double spaces between the URL here or FF . Net eats the link.) The comics and art which accompanies this series are there...and believe me I am a better artist than writer.

This scene contains strong language and Dubious Humor. IT CONTAINS SOME MAJOR DEVELOPMENTS BETWEEN CHARACTERS BUT IS GENERALLY A FLUFF SCENE.

**Most chapters of this series contain strong language and violence. Rated M for adult themes! Really! Transformers characters belong to Hasbro. Critiques adored!**

Maelstrom Chapter 25 Unicron: PART C

Continued From Part B!

When they had gotten back to Cybertron they had headed straight for Med-Bay. First Aid made a valiant attempt to hide his shock when Rodimus led Ultra Magnus in by the hand and pushed him into sitting on the examining table. He couldn't really hide how aghast he was though. The Autobot medic was unsatisfied with their incoherent explanations of what had happened and he pressed them over and over for more substantial answers. Optimus and Elita had been forewarned by Jazz before the shuttle even landed and were waiting in Med-Bay when they arrived. They did little better than First Aid in concealing their dismay, although they tried for Marissa's sake. The EDC Captain answered First Aid's questions with a tightly controlled voice that got gradually louder and louder until she was practically shouting. Tears of frustration gleamed unshed in her eyes and Lancer pulled her away to sit down. Rodimus made sure the remaining questions were directed at him, although he could do little to help First Aid understand.

Magnus remained unresponsive, and First Aid's obsessive testing proved useless. There was nothing physically wrong at all.

For three days, Magnus languished in Med-Bay. He didn't talk to anyone. He made no attempt to move unless someone pulled him, in which case he followed listlessly until they let go. Then he would stop in whatever stance they left him in. First Aid tested this at one point by raising one of Magnus' arms over his head; it dangled there for over an hour before the Medic finally gave up and lowered it again. Visitors went similarly unnoticed and if First Aid hadn't taken care of things, Marissa was certain Magnus would have let his energon dwindle down to nothing without moving to recharge. She spent all of her time in Med-Bay, even sleeping there with First Aid's blessing. She wanted to be there for Magnus the moment he "woke".

She was talking to him and trying to stroke those huge, motionless hands when Rodimus came in to visit on the third day. Jazz and KC had been in earlier. Jazz had played some ridiculous music in an effort to make Magnus cringe in horror, and had shamelessly insulted and teased the "Major General" about being even less fun than usual. Marissa felt some faint hope that playing "I am the Very Model Of a Modern Major General" might produce results (it usually sent Magnus into a fury) but felt even more hopeless after the fifth time Jazz played it. She also noticed KC place a hand "innocently" on Magnus' leg, and knew the young metal-shaper was hoping to find a way to rouse Magnus from his stupor without raising Marissa's hopes by telling her in advance. Marissa appreciated both of their efforts, but wasn't really surprised when KC dropped her hand and shook her head slightly at Jazz. They had left looking as discouraged as Marissa felt.

Marissa didn't know how long Rodimus had lingered in the doorway watching her - he moved too silently, though she wasn't sure she would have taken much note if he had come in playing a tuba. What she finally did feel was his eyes on her. He looked at her tiny hands on Magnus' and then to her grief-stricken eyes. He shifted silently to human form, and gathered her into his arms. She sobbed once into his shoulder and he rested his head on hers - stroking her hair. For a long moment they just stood there, sharing their grief.

"I can't reach him," Marissa whispered finally. Rodi's arms tightened around her. "He's in there somewhere, but I can't make him see the way home. He's lost and I can't reach him!"

"I know." Rodimus said. "Look. I have an idea. It's a big risk, and I don't know if it will help, but I think maybe we should try to turn him human. It will be harder for him to ignore the real world that way don't you think?"

Marissa pulled back and stared at Rodimus. The gift of hope was such a painful thing to receive. She had felt her hopes crushed so many times already, and there was a certain peace in resignation...but it wasn't like her to give up without a fight.

She smiled slightly at Rodi, and nodded.

First Aid argued about the risks. They had never tried the conversion capsule on anyone who wasn't fully functional before. He finally surrendered - not to Rodi's insistence that there wasn't anything physically wrong with Magnus - but to the silent way Marissa stared at him, as if she was expecting him to deny Magnus his only hope of recovery. The medic couldn't stand the way her eyes followed him, and caved in.

The procedure went flawlessly, but it changed Magnus' behavior not one hair. This time though, Marissa had the chance to gently dress him, and lead him by the hand back to their quarters. First Aid started to protest when she guided him out of Med-Bay, but Rodimus intervened, shaking his head and frowning at First Aid.

"He's not your patient anymore, First Aid. You can't help him. Let her try in her own way." Rodimus said.

First Aid stared at his commander, wishing he really understood what was going on. "What can she do?" he asked, still wondering how he had allowed them to go ahead with the procedure. It seemed he must have lost his reason with the rest of them if would allow a patient in such distress already go through a process that changed their very nature.

"I..I don't know First Aid, but she really loves him, and she knows him better than we do." Rodi said.

"Rodimus that's silly. I've known him for centuries! Marissa's only been with us a little more than a decade, and she wasn't that close to Magnus for even half of that time!" First Aid argued.

"It doesn't matter. She UNDERSTANDS him in a way we never will. That's why she loves him the way she does. There's a connection there we aren't privy to."

"You sound like you're talking about yourself and Lancer." First Aid grumbled, still unhappy with his surrender.

Rodi shrugged. "It's the same thing. Lancer and I just have the volume turned up a little louder than most people. Watch Op and Elita sometime. When they work together they are nearly silent. Op can tell her more in a glance than he manages with ten minutes of instruction for the rest of us. It's fun to watch. Even when they talk to each other half the sentences go unfinished. It's even funnier because I KNOW they have no idea they're doing it. They understand each other so well, they think they said it all, and are repeatedly surprised when I have to ask what the hell they're talking about."

First Aid stared at him. Being married to his work left him rather in the dark about such things. "I hope you're right," he finally said in resignation.

"So do I," Rodimus said. He left Med-Lab and headed for his office, nodding distractedly at people who greeted him as he passed. No one was much surprised anymore by his slightly rude behavior - it was more and more a part of his daily habits. When he got to his work-room he decided to leave the lights dimmed, except for the area around his desk. The room was cluttered with things he needed to do, and it seemed he never got quite caught up in spite of Jazz and Magnus' most heroic efforts to help him. He didn't really want to look at it all, although he realized, with a self-depricating snort, that trying to hide it from himself only heightened his awareness of it.

On the center of his desk was the immaculate stack of reports Magnus" had turned in on the shipping logs.

Rodi stared at it without touching it.

Minutes passed.

Rodimus finally straightened in his seat and smiled to himself. In his imagination, one very annoyed City Commander was standing in front of him, arms crossed, and glaring. The apparition stomped forward and jabbed at the stack of reports repeatedly, making the desk shake.

What did I do these for? Decoration?! I did not break my neck for a month just so you could sit and stare at them Hot Rod! Do I make myself clear?

"Yessir," Rodimus whispered to the darkness, and got to work. 

X

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It took him six hours to plod through the reports by himself. Most of what he found was too insubstantial to bother with yet, but Magnus had high-lighted several ships whose departure and arrival times weren't quite what they should be with no plausible explanation for the time shortages or delays. One in particular had consistent weight discrepancies too. Rodimus smiled to himself. Installing scales under the landing pads to weigh the ships had been a stroke of genius. No complicated equipment to install, or maintain. No energy signatures to mask. Just primitive, pressure sensitive scales no one would ever suspect of being there (or even cared too much if they had) to judge whether any given ship was carrying what they claimed they were carrying.

Magnus' idea of course. Rodimus and Optimus had gotten far too used to weaving complicated webs of illusion around everything they did to come up with anything that straight-forward and effective.

He asked the computer for the ship's next scheduled visit.

Tonight.

Wonderful. And he still had so much ordinary paperwork to take care of.

Help arrived a little unexpectedly.

I'll do it Rodi, Lancer sent.

Hi. I didn't know you were still awake...or did I wake you? Rodimus returned.

Let's just say I've been having dreams of mountains of paperwork threatening to slide down on my head and swallow me up, she responded - compassion and amusement coloring her response, plus that too familiar spark of loneliness that she had woken up by herself.

He returned with a wordless apology and a sort of amused disgust that he was waging war by bureaucracy. It wasn't a matter of battles and firepower anymore as it had been when the Decepticons were the real enemy. It was all a matter of information and intrigue, and he sent Lancer a ridiculous image of crushing the Jabez, literally, under a huge stack of reports. He felt her giggling, and then grow serious again.

I'll check that ship out for you, and I'll take care of it if I have to, she sent grimly.

Arguments rose in his mind - that it was his responsibility, that her shoulder wasn't fully healed, that the risk she would be spotted and recognized would let the Jabez know she was still alive and working with the Autobots - but none of it was the real reason. He didn't want her to risk herself, and he was vaguely afraid that if it came to killing she would fall back on her habit of blaming herself for everything.

He sensed her amusement. Who had taught him to hunt in the shadows anyway, she wanted to know. He sighed. He didn't want her to go, but he had to admit he needed her to. He could no longer delude himself into thinking he could handle everything alone.

He felt her laugh, and was bolstered by the wave of affection she sent at him before she shielded herself and made ready for the hunt.

He tried to ignore it when the killing started.

The next day he would have to publicly order an investigation into the explosion on a freighter just after take-off. It would turn up a malfunction in the weapons console which caused them to discharge and misfire back into the ship. Everyone on board was instantly turned to ash, with not enough remaining to identify the bodies or even bury. Funny how no grieving family members came forward to ask if their missing loved ones had been aboard in the weeks that followed.

Privately, he would have to investigate the identities of those on board through the fingerprints and photos Lancer had meticulously taken from each corpse - both Convert and slaver - before she had obliterated the ship. He had gotten caught up on his work and home just before she did. He took the sheets of prints from her cold hands with a sort of grave ceremony. He put it on the table by the door, and drew her to him.

"Thank you," he said.

She nodded, and held on to him.

It was pure heaven to hold her and feel not the tiniest resistance. For the first time, nothing in her sought to push him away.

It should have been the happiest moment of his life, but he knew without even touching her mind that they were both thinking of Magnus and Marissa.

"They'll be all right," he whispered.

"I know," she answered.

The kiss he gave her was meant to be gentle and comforting, but she responded with a desperate passion that was almost violent. He faltered in shock, but quickly responded with equal fury. He sensed a primitive truth driving her from the the wordless depths of her sub-conscious. It had to be now! Now! Before time or circumstances did anything else to wound or divide them, before some slaver, Quint, Jabez, or just dumb luck made moments of passion and happiness impossible instead of just difficult. He couldn't have resisted her if he'd wanted to. They didn't make it to the bedroom.

X

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Marissa valiantly ignored the stares of people she passed in the halls as she led Magnus down the hall by the hand. If she had stopped to ask what they were staring at, no one would have been able to answer her. They didn't know who Magnus was and there was nothing overtly unusual about a couple holding hands even here in the towering halls of Central. It wasn't that they seemed an attractive, well-matched pair, for all that the man's size was on the far-extreme of normal. They couldn't have said what was wrong. Maybe it was the way the man seemed blind (or dead) to the world around him. He followed her listlessly, his face a completely barren of emotion, and his feet flopping on the floor as if they moved on their own, with no consciousness in command to refine their actions.

He looks just like my CO! OhGod! Ican'tstand this!Ican't!! Marissa thought hysterically as they headed for her quarters. Her face revealed nothing of this - she even managed to smile at one of her co-workers as they passed. She fumbled for her key-card when they reached her rooms, and briefly expected some sound, some teasing remark out of the familiar shadow in the corner of her vision. He said nothing.

She finally got the door open, (Control those shaking hands Captain Fairborne!) and pushed Magnus inside. She turned to lock the door behind them and when she looked back, he was still standing there with his back to her, exactly where she had let go of his hand. Marissa leaned against the door and fought not to hyperventilate. Then she frowned with renewed determination.

Ignore ME will you? We'll just see about that, Mister City Commander! We'll just see about that! She straightened her shoulders and took him by the hand again. It seemed wrong somehow that it should be so warm. She led him to a chair, sat him down in it, and studied him -trying to divorce herself from her emotions and think on this problem objectively. It wasn't easy, but she did feel a little more in control.

"OK, you big lug. You obviously think I'm the kind of girl who's just gonna sit around and wait for her man to call. No way! You don't just walk out on Marissa Fairborne! I will hunt you down if I have to but get this straight! You're mine, and I demand your attention! Is that clear?"

No response. Not the flickering of an eyelash, but that was OK. Captain Fairborne was never one to back down from a fight. And she planned to fight.

Marissa looked wildly around her apartment, and began turning on everything she could reach. The television. The radio. Every light she possessed. She even set her alarm clock next to his seat and left it blaring. She put the tea kettle on the stove and let it whistle until it boiled over. She briefly wondered what the neighbors must be thinking and found she cared not in the slightest. She grabbed two pans and clanged them together behind his head. Was it her imagination or did he flinch just slightly at that one?

She ran around the couch and tried it again, looking hopefully into his eyes. There was no change as far as she could see, but she stubbornly refused to be discouraged.

She looked at the pans. "Are you hungry Big Guy?" she said, practically shouting. "Of course you are! You are always hungry! Right! Food it is!" She clanged the pans again just to emphasize her point, and half-ran to the kitchen. She continued announcing everything she was doing. "Let's see what we have! Popcorn smells good, we'll start with that! Right! Coffee. Yeah. You look like you could use a cup or ten. What do you think? You know it's incredibly rude not to answer someone when they ask you something! Hmm. Jello, miraculously left over from that wonderful dinner I so kindly made for you and your ingrate friends! This is how you thank me for all my trouble? Fine! I'll show you! You can forget about the popcorn, Major General! I've got something for the likes of you!"

She stormed back into the living room with a spoon and a bottle of tabasco sauce. She froze as she looked not at Magnus, but out the window behind him. Her hands dropped their contents nervelessly.

The moon was rising.

Trembling, she was suddenly drawn back to a few days prior. They were all there, laughing, enjoying the food and each other's company. Magnus had been sitting in the same chair he was now. She remembered his face only too clearly. He'd seemed so alive that night. Smiling, giving Rodimus and Jazz a hard time, teasing KC and Lancer, flirting with her...The image superimposed itself on the slack face in front of her now and she shuddered, staring once again at that hateful moon, remembering the cold caress of Unicron's mind as it sought entrance into her own....NO!

Marissa strode forward fiercely and shut the blinds. Then she strode back towards Magnus through the din she had created. She picked the spoon off the floor and looked for the bottle of tabasco sauce. She put her head down to the floor and found it under Magnus' seat. It hadn't broken on her carpeted floor and she elected to take it as a good omen, but she couldn't reach it easily either. She reached around Magnus' immobile ankles for a minute, and gave him a disgusted glare.

"Excuse me!" she said sarcastically, and she lifted one of his legs out of the way. She grunted with strain and then felt her fingers close over the cool glass. "There!" she cried, but then froze again as she sat up. The leg remain suspended. She stared at it, feeling desperation rise in her again. This couldn't be happening! It just couldn't!

"Get a grip Marissa!" she whispered to herself, clenching her hands so tightly around the bottle and the spoon that the spoon left deep grooves in her flesh when she finally felt back in control and let it go. Trying hard not to think about what she was doing and why, she put them back down on the floor, and pushed Magnus' solid limb back down.

"Time for your medicine," she sang cheerfully. She poured a sadistically big spoonful, pulled out his lower lip, and poured, briefly laughing at herself for bothering with the spoon. She stifled the laughter. It felt too much like she would never stop if she let it out.

She stared at Magnus, holding her breath. For a long moment nothing happened save that a little of the sauce dribbled out of his mouth down his chin. He swallowed convulsively. Then, unmistakably, a faint expression of distaste.

Laughing with joy, Marissa surged off her knees and wrapped her arms around him. She felt him swallow again and then that terrible stillness re-decended like a fog. She paused in disappointment and hung her head, letting it rest on his shoulder. She gathered her courage yet again, and suddenly felt much calmer. She gently wiped the sauce off his still face. He seemed like a statue carved out of soft, warm flesh - more robotic now than he had ever seemed before - but she felt better. Her former certainty that he was still in there returned. The similarities between his face and the face of her converted CO had made her doubt.

She ran her fingers over his lips and his cheeks. "OK, Mags. Play hard to get if you like. Just don't forget who you're dealing with." She kissed him very softly and got up, missing the way his eyes flickered after her when she did.

By morning she was exhausted but she never thought of going to bed.

X

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The door beeped.

"Who is it?" she cried.

"It's us," Rodimus said, "Can we come in?"

Marissa looked around her mangled quarters and felt a brief moment of embarrassment. How could she let visitors in on a mess like this? She had finally turned off the TV and the radio, more to preserve her own sanity than out of respect for the neighbors, but there was evidence of her frenzy everywhere. Plates of food littered the floor, obscene concoctions filled uncountable glasses. There was an empty tray of ice cubes next to Magnus' seat, and water stains down his shirt from where she had melted them, one by one, on the back of his neck. Then she shrugged. What difference did it make? She made a futile attempt to run her fingers through her wild hair, gave up, collected her dignity, straightened, and opened the door.

Rodi and Lancer did a good job not acting shocked. There was one of those long, awkward pauses though as they took in her pale face, the sleepless circles around her eyes, and the disaster that mangled her usually immaculate dwelling. Their compassion was palpable.

"Busy night, huh?" Lancer said as they stepped inside.

"Yeah, you could say the...HEY! Rodimus!" Marissa yelled. He was mussing up her hair more enthusiastically than he ever had before. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

"Well, it was such a mess anyway I figured you wouldn't mind!" he said, all boyish innocence.

It was so insane and so utterly like him, she had to smile just a little in disbelief. It wasn't that he was messing with her hair again; it was that he would go to such stupid extremes to cheer her up. He smiled fondly back.

"You are so full of shit Rodi," Marissa told him honestly.

"I know," he smiled. He seemed so proud.

Lancer looked around the room and chewed her lip thoughtfully, seeing the method in Marissa's obvious madness.

"Did you get any response at all?" she asked Marissa quietly. One look at Magnus was enough to tell her the battle wasn't over.

"Some. Now and then," Marissa said with obvious exhaustion. "I never can predict it though. Salt and vinegar on his tongue gets a twitch. Ice cubes on his neck, nothing. If I put him on the toilet, he uses it. If I put food in his mouth, he swallows - but he won't chew it first. If I put something in his hand, his fingers close around it but he never looks to see what it is. I suppose," she said despondently, "that's better than nothing."

"May I scan him?" Lancer asked.

"Will it hurt him?" Marissa asked, wondering vaguely how it was suddenly her decision instead of Rodimus'.

"No," Lancer said.

Marissa shrugged and watched as Lancer knelt before Magnus and stared into his eyes. Her own eyes glowed softly. Rodimus took Marissa's hand and inspected the "experiments." She saw him take note of the half-empty bottle of tabasco sauce.

"Getting a little rough on the big guy, weren't you?" he said gently.

Marissa shrugged. "It was the first thing he responded to and continued to respond to."

"I can't imagine why!" Rodi quipped. "She's a mean one, Mags! I'd watch my ass if I were you!"

"Rodi! Say that again!" Lancer ordered.

"What? I'd watch my ass..?"

"No. Call him Mags again!"

"Sure. Twist my arm!" Rodimus leaned close to his friend's face. "Mags! If you sit here like this too long your butt is going to go numb and then what will you think with? I'm giving Wheelie your office by the way. If you like Marissa's chair this much you can stay in here. I wouldn't let Wheelie run Metroplex by himself, of course, so I'm assigning Tracks and Sludge to help him! I expect vast improvements by the end of the week." He paused, and saw no visible change. Lancer was looking "into" Magnus intently though.

"Anything?" Rodi asked, his voice all seriousness.

"Not that time, sorry," Lancer said, "but the first time sparked something. He's hearing things, but I think it's pretty random."

"What do you see? Can you help him?" Marissa asked, although she knew in her heart Lancer would have done something already if she could.

"I can't help him, Marissa. But I can tell you that he IS still alive - he's still thinking. If anything, he's thinking TOO much, and the energy patterns are very erratic. It's mostly in the areas that involve memory and I think he's just too overwhelmed to really be aware of us."

"Has he gone insane? Will he get better?" Marissa asked, her voice rising.

Rodi and Lancer looked at each other.

"I don't know," Lancer finally admitted. "It's like Unicron cannon-balled into his memories like we would into a calm pond, and stirred up all the water and the mud from the bottom. It's going to take a while for everything to settle."

"Is...is that what happened to you?" Marissa whispered. Lancer nodded.

"But...you didn't...just leave reality behind like this!"

"No. I went violently mad and spent three months screaming nonsense at the top of my lungs at my friends. Maybe it has to do with the different demons which invaded us, or maybe this is just Magnus' way of putting himself back together. He's never been prone to hysterical fits. We won't know until he snaps out of it. I DO think it was a good idea to turn him human, and I think you should keep doing what you can to get his attention. Some things ARE getting through, and maybe it will help him separate the now from the then and let him get his bearings, so to speak."

Marissa nodded. "Thanks. It helps to know I haven't completely lost my mind...or his."

"It might also help," Rodimus said gently, looking at her tired face, "for you both to go lie down and get some rest. Getting worn out isn't going to help either of you."

Marissa nodded in assent, "I want to clean up this mess first, but OK."

"Hear that Mags? I'm sending YOU to recharge for once! How did you let that happen?" Rodimus asked just as though he expected an answer.

"Ooo, that got a response," Lancer said. Marissa didn't laugh, but she felt a bit better.

They helped her clean up.

X

X

X

When they finally got the place in order Marissa was feeling the long hours between her and her last sleep. They promised to check on her later and Lancer made her swear she would call if she needed anything at all. Marissa had sworn, mostly so that they would leave. She had noticed at some point that they both had bruises in some suspicious places and had a very good idea they HADN'T gotten them in practice. She didn't want to think about it.

Getting Magnus into bed was rather a feat. She had to undress him and he wouldn't cooperate by lifting his arms or legs - she had to do it all for him, and was forced to stand on the bed to get his shirt over his head. She pushed him into sitting on the mattress and then got his legs up one at a time. It took real effort because she had to push his bulk around so that he was laying the right direction. By the time she was done she was sweating and cursing. When it was done, she did her best to arrange his limbs comfortably, taking cues from his usual sprawl, although she rather selfishly left herself a few inches to sleep in for a change. He lay there like a breathing land-mass exactly as she placed him, and making no effort to close his eyes. Even when she turned the lights off, she could see them gleaming in the darkness as he stared vacantly at the ceiling.

The thought that she would have to close them for him occurred to her, and she once again suffered a crushing moment of pure horror.

That's what they do when you're dead! DEAD! He's NOT dead! He can't be dead! I'm supposed to die first! We talked about how I'm going to die first!

"Damn you! This isn't how we planned it! You've got this all wrong you stupid Autobot!" Marissa cried. Then she cringed when she realized she'd said it out loud. The glints in his eyes didn't flicker. Marissa threw herself away from him and ran to the bathroom, slamming the door behind her. She slid down the back of the door and curled up on the floor, sobbing. Some part of her knew that the sick feeling in her stomach, and the sobs that wracked her body were partly due to lack of sleep and the fact that while she had given Magnus a taste of many things, she had neglected to feed herself. She remembered this feeling from when she was a child, sent to her room without supper and crying over whatever Great Injustice had landed her there - usually something to do with not wanting to come inside when she was supposed to. She wrapped her arms around her knees and rocked herself until there were no more tears left in her. She gave herself a nice headache too and she needed to blow her nose.

At long last, she got listlessly to her feet and went to the sink to put cold water on her face. It felt good, and she gasped. When she straightened she caught a glimpse of the mirror.

And who was that person? Who was that mad-woman with the swollen, blotchy face, the blood-shot eyes, running nose, and hair like a car-wreck? That can't be you, can it Captain Fairborne? You look like a vagrant, to put it kindly. You look like an escapee from a mental institution. If you want to attract a man's attention you need to do something about this! Pull yourself together! Falling to pieces isn't going to help anyone, now is it? What happened to Little Miss Put Together? I thought you knew how to handle stuff! Magnus would be so ashamed....

She splashed water on her face again. Then she fought to clear her throbbing sinuses on numerous strips of toilet paper. Brushing her hair was an arduous and painful chore. She looked down in disgust when she ended up pulling out a rather large tangle by force. She glared at the snarl in the comb and tried to remember the last time she'd lost that much hair to neglect. She couldn't and wasn't much enjoying the way her scalp hurt either. (Thanks so much Rodi...I'll get you for this one!) She took some aspirin and a quick shower. While her body relaxed she found she was once again able to make plans to work on the problem instead of just reacting to it emotionally. The shower made her think she should try it later with Magnus. (There was no way she was pulling him out of bed now that she had him in it though! That could wait a while!) Besides, if her other ideas worked, the shower would be more necessary later.

She hopped out, toweled off, took some Tylenol, and combed out her hair again. She checked the mirror and wasn't totally satisfied but at least her eyes looked like they actually opened again. She headed for the door, stopped, and went back to throw on some of Magnus' favorite perfume. Her nightgown lay abandoned on the back of the toilet as she strode back into the bedroom with the same posture she used in combat.

Inspecting the battlefield showed that Magnus had moved slightly, just enough so that she now had nowhere to sleep. Well, that was fine. She was no longer planning on sleeping on the MATTRESS. After all, why should tonight be any different from any other night? She doubted she could sleep any more without some part of his body intervening between herself and a comfortable night's rest.

"OK, Mister City Commander! Let's see if you can ignore THIS!" she whispered into his ear, and then she proceeded nibbling and blowing on it. Ah-Hah! A twitch! She stretched the length of her body on his, and went to work.

Continued in Unicron: Part D!


	4. Chapter 4

Maelstrom Chapter 24  
Unicron PART D 

Author's note: This story is part of a LONG series called Maelstrom. It is strictly Gen. 1 - sorry, but that was all that was out when I started writing back in the late 1980's. It began as a fan-publication so the first chapters are in the form of a comic book! If you have not read the nine original **Maelstrom Comics** and the preceding text stories, I strongly suggest you do. This is a complex universe. They can be found at http// illmatar. deviantart. com (I have put double spaces between the URL here or FF . Net eats the link.) The comics and art which accompanies this series are there...and believe me I am a better artist than writer.

This scene contains strong language and Dubious Humor. IT CONTAINS SOME MAJOR DEVELOPMENTS BETWEEN CHARACTERS BUT IS GENERALLY A FLUFF SCENE.

**Most chapters of this series contain strong language and violence. Rated M for adult themes! Really! Transformers characters belong to Hasbro. Critiques adored!**

Maelstrom Chapter 25 Unicron: PART D

Lancer returned late that evening with KC, and was pleased to see Marissa looking and acting a little more like herself. She had her hair tied back in a simple pony-tail, and the place was still clean. The radio was on and playing, but not too loud. There was a bowl of chocolate pudding on the coffee table next to Magnus, and a nearly empty bottle of tabasco sauce. She had him dressed in boxer shorts and a robe. She greeted them with a faint, but real smile.

"How's it going?" Lancer said, giving her a hug.

"Better, I guess. I'm handling it a little better at least. Come on in KC, don't be such a stranger."

"Rodi sends his regrets. Bullshit happened, as usual. I'm supposed to fuck-up your hair but as far as I'm concerned, if he thinks that's cute, he can do it himself!" Lancer's voice held a mixture of loving amusement and exasperation.

Marissa grinned a little. "Thanks. There's a massive hair clog in my drain with his name on it, and I intend to take it out on his hide."

"Ooo! Can I stay and watch? Oo! Oo! Can I HELP?!" Lancer said, with sadistic glee.

"Sure!" Marissa smiled, comforted somehow by the fact she could still act like an idiot. Lancer smiled too, but KC didn't. The poor girl looked ready to cry. She was staring from Magnus to Marissa, and blinking rapidly.

"KC?" Marissa asked.

"I...I'm sorry Marissa," she said, choking. Somehow Marissa knew this was an apology rather than just sympathy.

"For what?"

"For l..letting Unicron knock me out. He kn..knew I could trap him and anyone he possessed. I felt it when he attacked me. If...if I'd been stronger maybe...maybe...." She turned her back on them abruptly and stood staring at the ceiling with her fists clenched. She turned back again before either of the surprised women could say anything. The tears still shone, but didn't fall. "I'm just so angry with myself, that's all. My first mission with you guys and I fuck it up! And now Magnus is...is..." She trailed off again, flushed with frustration and not knowing how to finish.

"Is a little more responsive than he was yesterday," Marissa finished for her. "It's not your fault KC. None of us knew what to do. He'll be OK."

"He's better?" Lancer said, stepping up to the couch and kneeling down in front of him again, her eyes white and scanning. "Hmmm...Things do look a little more... organized. What have you been doing?"

"Well, I thought about what you said, and decided if things were in such disarray INSIDE then I'd better kept things simple out here instead of trying to hit him with everything at once. The cacophony I started with yesterday was leaving my head a jumble. I'm trying to play songs he knows, stuff like that. There's not many of those but I'm getting more consistent responses now."

"Have you gotten him to look at you?" Lancer asked, still staring into those vacant eyes.

"Once, I think. For a moment." Marissa said.

"Really? How?" KC asked.

There was a very long pause. Lancer looked up at Marissa, who had her hand over her face and then at a very confused looking KC. Marissa dropped her hand, opened her mouth, and then hid her face again.

"Ahh," Lancer said. "I was wondering if I should have suggested that this morning, but I see you thought of it on your own."

Marissa dropped her hand again and glared suspiciously at Lancer, unsure of whether she was being ridiculed or not. Lancer seemed quite sincere. KC, still somehow revering her superiors as completely professional and therefore asexual beings, hadn't quite caught on yet.

"What?" she asked.

Marissa turned to her, opened her mouth and put out her hand to speak, and then flushed.

KC's eyes widened. "Oh," she said, blushing also.

Lancer smiled, "I'm surprised at you Marissa. You're the one who grabbed him by the nuts at the mall when he wasn't cooperating trying things on!"

Marissa sighed, and flopped down on the couch next to her silent mate. "I know. I...I guess it's just because...well. It was so strange, and I felt so..so perverse doing it."

"He responded though."

"Well, his body did anyway and I did get that one look out of him, but it was almost..." she sighed, and shook her head. "It was like making love to an inanimate object. Like he was one of those dolls people buy. I couldn't bring myself to do it more than once but when it was over, for just one second, he looked at me. And I had this thought that... that maybe he even knew who I was."

"Maybe you should try it again," KC said, and then covered her mouth with her hand, as if she couldn't believe what she just said. Marissa couldn't help but smile at her a little.

"Well, it worked for Rodimus," Lancer said with a faintly smug smile.

"Rodimus?" Marissa said, "You mean after he was tortured? You never said anything before."

"Yeah, well. I was never sure I did the right thing before. It worked, but I thought maybe that was part of what made our link unbreakable."

"Rodimus was catatonic?" KC asked.

"More like apathetic. Sometimes I think he was truly catatonic especially at first, but later on it wasn't that he didn't know who or where he was, he just didn't give a shit. If I had left him to die, it would have been hunky-dorrey with him."

"Sex changed that?" Marissa mused.

"Let's just say it was the final step. There was also a lot of screaming and ass-kicking to go around."

Marissa looked thoughtful and smiled a little to herself. "Someday, when this is over, you are going to have to tell me everything."

Lancer smiled and felt Rodimus' frantic protests in the back of her mind. "It's a deal."

"Rodimus doesn't mind?" KC asked in disbelief.

"Of course he minds! So what? I can gossip about my mate if I want to. The only difference between me and any other woman is that he ends up hearing what I've said through the link. The way I see it he has an advantage over other men, not some right to deny me the pleasure of talking about him behind his back!"

"Lancer you're impossible," Marissa said.

"But...but....." KC said, "You can't just...just ignore his wishes that way. He's a PRIME."

"No he's not. He's Rodi! At least to me he's Rodi. The man I potty trained. The man I force fed for months. He's my friend, my lover, and a great big pain in the ass. The one thing he is not is my superior. You need to start thinking of him that way too, KC. With the possible exception of the lover part." Lancer leered a little.

KC shook her head. "I can't get used to this."

"You will eventually," Marissa said, picking up Magnus' hand and lacing her fingers into it. His hand tightened around hers and KC looked up in hopeful surprise.

"It always does that," Marissa said, shaking her head at KC's excitement.

"You're getting some kind of feedback though," Lancer said. "He feels it, a least a little."

"Really?" Marissa asked, now mirroring KC's enthusiasm. She looked into Magnus' eyes and tried not to be disappointed when she saw no recognition. She sank back into the couch, and sighed.

"Be patient, Marissa. I think you've made remarkable progress already. Give him time."

"I know. I've just never been very good at waiting." She sighed again, trying to dissolve the lump which threatened to close off her throat. "You want to know the worst part? The worst part is I need him to help me cope with this. I need him to hold me and tell me it's going to be fine. When did I stop being self-reliant? When did I start to NEED him?"

Lancer patted her knee and stood up. "Probably the same exact instant you fell in love with him. We are leaving. Call whenever for whatever, you got that?"

"You told me that yesterday." Marissa said.

"And I'm telling you again today. I'll tell you again tomorrow too because I know for a fact you have no intention of calling me for anything."

"You may be surprised," Marissa said with resignation.

"Good. Come on KC."

"Bye Marissa. Good luck!" KC said, as Lancer swiftly took her by the hand out the door.

"Well, that was abrupt!" Marissa said. "OK, Big Guy. You stink. Let's go for that shower, shall we?" She was somewhat encouraged by the fact Lancer had been thinking of suggesting sex. It made her feel a little less like some kind of rapist, although she had to concentrate hard to keep from imagining what her mother would say. 

X

X

X

She led him to the bathroom, undressed him, and stood him in front of the toilet. She was grateful that at least she didn't have to put him in diapers but wondered what was in there prompting him to use it. On a hunch, she removed the picture she had hanging over the toilet and was not surprised when he stopped. She sighed, and returned the picture to the wall. He was like an amoeba, responding to certain stimuli out of instinct, and as soon as the picture was back in his line of vision he began urinating again.

Undaunted, she waited for him to finish, and then guided him towards the shower. She stood there a long moment trying to figure out how she was going to get him into the tub without tipping him over. She wasn't sure he would balance himself if she lifted his legs one at a time, and there was sure no way she could just lift him! She smiled grimly to herself and opened the curtain. Lifting his left arm, she placed it palm flat against the wall. Then she started with his right leg. As expected, his stiff arm kept him from falling as she struggled to get his heavy limb over the high sides of her tub. It was the first time she'd ever regretted not having a simple shower stall.

"OK Mags! Left arm down! Right arm up! Hey! It's aerobics! Oooff! Left.. leg... up... aaand OVER! Ungh! Shit! That's tough to move! Right arm down! Water on! No that's too cold! It takes forever for this thing to adjust! You promised to take care of that for me! You said you were going to knock some heads and get this stuff running efficiently! You getting soft in your old age? OK. It's finally ready. Shower on! Here we go! And...OOH!"

Marissa turned around and happened to glance at Magnus' face, not really expecting to find anything.

He was looking at her. He was looking AT her!

"Magnus?! Magnus?!" she cried. She threw herself against his body. He twitched, but didn't move to touch her, and his eyes showed no real recognition - just a vague confusion. The water splattered up to his face occasionally, and he blinked. He blinked again when she touched his face.

"Magnus?" she whispered, running her shaking fingers over his chin and up the side of his jaw. "Magnus?" she cried again. "Can you answer me? Do you know who I am?" He followed her with his eyes a minute more.

Then he was gone again.

She called to him a few more times, brushing her fingers all over his bland face and kissing him desperately. "Magnus," she finally moaned in defeat, her arms wrapped loosely around his neck, the top of her head bowed to rest against his chest. She might as well have been leaning on a tree. Why did this make her feel worse? Why couldn't she take it as a good sign?

"You're such a stubborn bastard," she finally said. "Oh shit. Forgot the wash-cloths." Out she went to the linen closet, leaving a trail of wet foot prints on the wood. Special privilege. Having a wood floor on Cybertron. Came from having friends in high places. Lucky girl, that Marissa. Back into the shower with the now literal pillar of his community. Pour on the soap and get scrubbing. Oo looky! An erection! Well, some of the synapses are still firing anyway. Better wash that too. Mr. City Commander may still use the bathroom like a pro, but he wasn't too careful about cleaning up after now was he?

Marissa looked up at his face again. Nothing.

"Great. You sure know how to make a girl feel special Mags," she said facetiously. It bothered her to have to do this to him, but she wanted him back. At least yesterday there had been that moment he seemed to have KNOWN her. It hadn't lasted as long as today's little awakening, but it had seemed more real. Like HE had been there. She would do whatever it took to make that permanent.

But what should that be exactly? Did it matter? What gave him the most pleasure anyway? Her mouth? Her body on his? She didn't know. She'd never asked him. Why hadn't she ever asked him?! She tried to think back, but she still didn't know how to judge. She'd been content to know she'd pleased him and that he pleased her. She thought back on the last time they'd been together. It had been right here in the shower, just after the party. Magnus couldn't get everyone out the door fast enough. She'd mumbled about two seconds of protest around the kiss he'd given her right there at the door. Something about the dishes needing done. His hands on her breasts had convinced her the dishes could wait. The next thing she'd known they were at the shower, having managed to strip each other on the way without ever breaking their kiss. She'd fumbled for the faucets one handed while the other was...occupied. It had been Magnus' turn to mumble complaints while she'd gnawed on his lips and fought with the temperature. He'd cursed the incompetent bastards who'd installed the water system and vowed to make them suffer. The instant she'd had it ready they were inside, the water making their bodies slick. His hands had seemed to be everywhere, and she pushed him (with his compliance) against the back wall, and straddled him. He'd held her aloft while she drove herself into a frenzy on his shaft, groaning and smiling when she came, and then he'd turned around, put HER back to the wall, and ridden her hard....

Suddenly back in the present, she wondered if she should try to recreate that experience for him. The thought left her cold. She didn't want to, not for her own sake anyway. A few days ago, the water had seemed like an incredible aphrodisiac. Now it was just a shower. As for his erection.. well.

"I guess this lays to rest any doubts I only love you for your body, Magnus. I love you. I want YOU. You've got a gorgeous body but I don't care if you aren't with me. Come back to me." She took his penis in her hands, and used the washcloth to stimulate it, keeping her eyes locked on his face the whole time as she had the night before. It was the same as the previous night. His body twitched occasionally, but he showed no overt signs of pleasure. He was silent, unheard of for him. His face remained still right up to the point of orgasm. Just before he came, his eyes shut, his back arched a little, and then he ejaculated.

Marissa's eyes jerked down to the semen that stained the cloth in her hands. She should have mounted him! She should have taken that into herself! Maybe she could have gotten pregnant so that if he never came back she could still have a part of him.... She had a flare of painful insight. She knew now why in spite of all the pain and fear Lancer suffered being pregnant alone that she had been unable to abort that baby... She understood their agony now. Their minds so close, but unable to touch.... There, but not there! She shuddered, and fell to her knees. She didn't want to understand them! Not like this!

She heard a faint moan, and thought it was herself. Then his hand touched the back of her neck. She was too startled to even scream. She turned her eyes slowly upward. Another false alarm, surely. His eyes met hers when she finally got them up to his face.

"Mm..Ma..riss..ssa," he whispered.

"Magnus..?" she said, feeling her blood-pressure drop as she stood. There was no hysterical excitement this time. Just fear, and a sad certainty this wouldn't last. They were like people on separate little boats...drifting close enough to touch now and then, but soon to drift apart. She took his hands and held tight.

"W..what....?" Magnus whispered. His voice sounded so far away.

"Don't you remember? Do you know who I am?"

"Yes....no."

"Magnus? Magnus? Do you know who I am?" Her calm voice shocked her.

He said something that might have been her name, but faded off before he finished.

She wrapped her arms around him. "I miss you," she whispered soundlessly. It didn't matter. He wouldn't hear her anyway.

That night, when she managed to arouse him again, she rode him until he came within her. She felt nothing though and he didn't snap out of it. Not even for a minute.

X

X

X

Her life took on a certain regularity. Long periods of fighting to bring him around, punctuated with a few brief occasions of success - giving her just enough hope to really hurt.

Lancer, Rodimus, Jazz, and KC visited as often as they could. They brought her meals she often forgot to eat, until even Rodimus was chastising her about it. They bought her new bottles of tabasco sauce. Jazz showed off for her. KC chattered off the latest news and gossip from EDC and Marissa knew this took special effort on KC's part since she usually secluded herself from such things in Perceptor's lab. Rodimus would be all concerned attention for her one minute, and insulting "Major General Mags" the next. He and Jazz must have stayed up all night coming up with some of the things they taunted her mate with. Once they even got a brief, surly glare from their catatonic victim. It only spurred them to new heights. Lancer scanned Magnus regularly, and claimed things were settling down. She was forced to admit though (after an increasingly cynical Marissa hounded her about it) that she didn't know if that meant he was improving or leaving them altogether.

Elita and Optimus had paid a few awkward visits, but somehow she sensed that the fact they hadn't been there left a gulf that couldn't be breached that wasn't there with the others who had been present. She couldn't describe Unicron's horrendous mental intrusion to Elita and Optimus; and with those that had been there she didn't need to. It was the same with Spike and Carli, her long time friends, and yet their words of comfort seemed so hollow, in spite of the fact that those words were nearly identical to what KC and Lancer often told her. Spike and Carli meant well and they tried to understand, but they didn't KNOW. Acree and Springer came by a couple of times, but they seemed so lost and confused Marissa felt like she needed to be consoling them. She wondered if she looked so miserable when she looked at the motionless form of their City Commander.

Her parents called from Earth more and more frequently, first asking, then demanding to know what was wrong.

What could she tell them? They didn't know about Ultra Magnus, not as her lover anyway. She couldn't tell them she was sleeping with an Autobot, now a catatonic, probably dying Autobot, and that she was making every effort to get pregnant by him. She couldn't deal with the fall out. She just blandly repeated that nothing was wrong, not even caring that they didn't believe her. Rodimus made sure that when they used their connections to check on her that the records showed her still on duty as usual. She supposed she should be grateful but it was getting harder and harder to care.

Magnus hadn't spoken to her since the shower and she was starting to seriously believe she'd dreamt the whole thing. Even if she hadn't, it was probably just another reflexive response to call her name when he came, just like he would urinate if you put him in front of the toilet. Force of habit, nothing more. She was starting, just a little, to hate him for it.

To be honest, she was also starting to feel like she was about to join him. Her quarters had become an isolation tank of a kind, and she found she didn't much care. Her hopes had been raised and dropped, raised and dropped so frequently that it seemed much more sensible to not even hope.

Rodimus apparently found this attitude even more upsetting than Magnus' condition.

"He WILL be back Marissa, and he's going to need you there when it happens." Rodimus said one night. It was almost three weeks since she'd shut her shades on the moon.

"Sure. He'll be back." She sounded listless even to herself.

"I had to let Lancer go off to die before I got her back Marissa. I had to wait all this time for her to really accept US. It was worth it. SHE is worth it. Magnus deserves his time to heal too! He deserves you to wait for him a little longer than a few weeks."

Marissa hadn't answered Rodimus. He was right. She knew he was right and she did make the effort. It was just hard crying herself to sleep in the arms of the man she loved every night, wishing, just once, that they would close around her.

Some days she even managed to be cheerful, talking to Magnus as if he could hear her and teasing him the way Jazz and Rodimus did. The music played, she sang along, took his hands, and danced in front of him. She did stupid things to keep busy. She tried all the recipes people had given to her when she left for the academy that she'd never looked at since. One even got a bigger expression of disgust out of Magnus than the tabasco sauce. Figures it was one of the few she actually liked. She gave him lots of it. Then she rearranged everything in her rooms so efficiently that the Major General himself couldn't have surpassed it, although she did dare him to try. They watched a lot of TV together until Marissa decided it was probably making things worse.

Through it all, Magnus would flirt with consciousness a dozen times a day and then vanish into whatever hell he was inhabiting. Maybe that was why she felt such anguish every time he came around. The look in his eyes was always that of hopeless suffering. Somewhere within that skull Ultra Magnus was trapped in some terrible cycle of pain. It made her crazy. The ticking of the clock became a form of torture on its own. On at least two occasions she'd taken her laser and stood before him - her arm stretched to its fullest extent with the sights between his eyes.

"Do it!" his vacant eyes seemed to tell her. "Do it! Blow the back of my head off and let me out of here! Set me free!"

They'd find her body next to his, if only she could just squeeze that finger a little tighter......

In the end though, Rodi's words always came back to her. "Magnus deserves his time to heal too!" He did deserve it. He deserved a chance. But what if he didn't want it? What then?

She always ended up curled up around her gun, sobbing and quaking with indecision.

X

X

X

Finally, in the fifth week, he spoke again.

"I'm thirsty," he said.

Marissa screamed. She'd been changing his shorts to get him ready for bed, and the strange voice in the room had taken her completely off guard.

"I'm thirsty," he repeated. At the moment, he didn't remember anything that had happened, but it was vitally important to him to convey that message. His tongue was rubber, and he felt very ill over all.

"Magnus? Magnus can you hear me? Do you know who I am?" Marissa asked. Now why the hell was she crying?

"Marissa? I'm thirsty." That seemed simple enough to understand. He was obviously sick. His limbs felt like solid lead.

"Magnus? You DO know me! Oh! Thank God!" She threw her arms around his neck. Very nice, but that wasn't what he wanted from her. Obviously they were having trouble communicating.

"I'm thirsty."

"You're thirsty? You are? You are! That's wonderful!" Marissa said, smiling and crying all at once. Someone around here plainly needed a vacation.

"I'm thirsty." It took real effort to put those two words together, couldn't she see that? Didn't she know he was sick?

"I'll go get you some water. D..Don't go away! Promise me! Don't go away!" she said, scurrying backwards towards the bathroom, without taking her eyes off of him. Where the hell was he going to go? He could hardly move. What had happened to him anyway? The last thing he remembered clearly was the party...and something about Lancer....Lancer and the moon....

Marissa rushed back into her room and froze. The glass fell unheeded from her fingers. He had left her. He had left her again.

"no. NoNoNONONO!!!" She started screaming the word over and over. "NO! You bastard! YOUGODDAMNEDFUCKING AUTOBOT ASSHOLE! DON'T YOU DARE LEAVE ME!" She rushed him with an incoherent shriek and started pounding on his immobile knees, his arms, and his chest. Screaming and crying hysterically, she didn't notice when her flailing arms connected with his nose and lips, bloodying both slightly.

She did notice when he caught her hands.

"Marissa? You've really lost it!"

"Oh you BASTARD!" she roared. Her hands pulled free and he had a stunning vision of her as she drew her right fist back.

Nice form he thought, even as her knuckles torpedoed straight for his face.

She had her hands over her mouth in purest shock by the time he hit the bed. He lay there a moment, looking at the ceiling, and tasting the blood in his mouth. Some of his front teeth were a little loose, but it was admiration which held him speechless. What a hit! How did she get a hit like that out of that cute little body? It didn't seem possible! It also didn't seem possible that one person could laugh and cry hysterically all at the same time, but then Marissa was an exceptional person.

"Marissa?" Magnus said, sitting up VERY carefully. "Why..why did you hit me?"  
"Do you have any idea of what you've put me through you asshole? Do you have any idea?! And you..you accuse ME of losing it! Of course I'm losing it! I love you you bastard, and you're breaking my heart!"

He looked at her in innocent confusion.

"You don't remember anything?" she asked, sitting beside him on the bed and taking his hand. He didn't know why she should stare so hard at his fingers as they curled around hers automatically. He didn't know why she was crying. He shook his head uncertainly.

"I don't know if I should remind you," she said nervously.

"Have I been sick?" Magnus asked.

"You...you were..hurt," Marissa said. "Badly, badly hurt."

"Where?" he said, looking down at his body. He felt sluggish but no pain except for where she'd hit him.

She hesitated. "Here," she said finally, touching his temple.

"I got hit on the head? Did Rodi do it?"

"No! Of course Rodi didn't do it!" Marissa said with a half laugh. She knew he wasn't serious. "And you didn't get hit ON the head....You got hit..in your head."

"IN my head?" Magnus asked, a little amused, but also suddenly frightened. Something was rising in him. Some memory. Slowly coming to the surface like a pale white corpse in dark water. His mouth opened to ask what she was talking about and remained open in a perfect O of horror.

"Magnus? MAGNUS!" Marissa cried, although he could barely hear her over his own screams. He wailed in anguish as he relived, in totality, Unicron's violating invasion. Curling up on his side he screamed and screamed, vocalizing all the terror he had felt but been unable to release when Unicron had control of his body.

"NO! Magnus! I'm sorry! Magnus I'm here! Please! PLEASE don't leave me again! Magnus! I'm here! I'm here!" She had her arms around his quaking body as far as they would go. She sobbed with him, rocked him, and covered his face with kisses. "I love you. Let me help you! Let me be WITH you! Don't leave me behind again!" She went on and on that way while he let the pain out in a violent rush. It wasn't long before his body, long in disuse, exhausted itself on his terror. He let her hold him the whole time while he tried to cope with what had happened to him. He stared into space, trying to make sense of it all. This terrified Marissa.

"Magnus!" she cried, disengaging and scrambling to the floor to stare into his eyes. "MAGNUS! Oh, answer me PLEASE!"

"Marissa...Unicron....he...he"

"He's dead Magnus! You defeated him! You threw him out! And Rodimus and Lancer destroyed him for good! Do you remember that?"

"No..yes. I'm not sure. Everything's so confused." He looked at her and wept silently, not moving out of the fetal position he had taken.

"I know. I know. Lancer said it would be. She said Unicron stirred up your memories and that it would take a while for them to settle." Marissa tried to sound reassuring.

"I feel so weak."

"You've been catatonic for over a month now." Marissa told him.

Magnus stared at her. That wasn't what he'd meant but the news shocked him. "A month?" he whispered, his eyes dilating. "A month!"

She nodded and sniffled, unconsciously wiping her nose with the back of her hand like a child. She looked utterly vulnerable in that instant - a forlorn, fragile young girl with eyes entirely too big for her thin, pale face.

"Oh. Oh no, Marissa. I'm sorry." Magnus said, and she leaned forward to rest her forehead next to his on the bed. He put his arm over her shoulder, and she wrapped hers around him again. He felt her shaking with silent tears and felt guilty somehow in having put her through this. It wasn't right that she should suffer because he didn't know how to defend himself. He had to do something to reassure her so that she wouldn't have to worry anymore.

"It will be alright Marissa," he said. "Everything will be fine." He didn't believe it either , but he was still surprised when this undid her completely. She sobbed, and choked, and laughed aloud, and the tremors in her body increased by a factor of ten. For crying out loud, he knew it was a lame reassurance but this was ridiculous! He sat up a little in her arms with a clear expression of consternation.

She leaned back on her knees and wiped her nose with her arm again. She stopped half-way and he saw her realized what she was doing. Her eyes glistened with tears and a little mischief. She was giggling. Obviously, he was missing something.  
"What's funny? What's so damned funny?" he demanded.

She quit giggling and started really laughing.

He sat up the rest of the way and gawked at her. What a mess she was. Blotchy face. Running nose. Dumb, messed up pony-tail. Baggy "slob clothes" as she called them. She was quite possibly the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen as she sat on the floor laughing at him for no apparent reason. He was still trying to figure her out when she launched herself at his face to kiss him passionately.

"YEE-OOWWCH!"

"Magnus?! Are you OK?!"

"No I'm not OK! My nose is bleeding, my lips are bleeding, and my whole jaw hurts! What did you expect?! You punched me in the face!" he cried indignantly. "Look! Blood!" he went on, wiping his nose off and presenting her his fingers. "Ow," he added, just for emphasis, as he gingerly explored his face for damage.

She started giggling again. He threw her a withering stare.

"I've really missed you," she said, still giggling.

"You have a funny way of showing it," he said peevishly, baring his sore teeth and feeling around them with his tongue.

"Marry me," she said.

"WHAT?!" he shrieked. She was trying to kill him. That was it.

"Marry me," she said again. So he HAD heard her right the first time.

"Marissa! You can't be serious!" Either that or she had just lost her mind. He looked at her face. She was serious. Great Cybertron! She really loved him! How astonishing!

"You are serious," he said. "Marissa why? What brought this on?" Not that he couldn't guess.

"Lots of things, but mostly the realization that I want to spend the rest of my life with you, and I want to make it official so that you won't be so quick to run out on me again." She giggled a little more, and then grew still again - her eyes brimming with a thousand unnameable emotions.

"I don't know what to say," he said. Why did she always spring stuff on him when he was confused and off-balance? Probably so he would do what she wanted. Hmm...good strategy.

"Say yes," she said. Oh sure. Like THAT was going to happen!

"uh...Yes," he heard himself say. NONONO! Damn! She did it again!

She tackled him, laughing. (Of course she was laughing! She just got her way again!) She had him pushed back down on the bed before he knew what she was doing, only then noticing his shorts (Boxers? Uggh!) had been down around his ankles this whole time.

"Ouch! Ow! Owmmmppff! HEY! Oh! Marissa! Take it easyeeEEE!" Then again, maybe he should just get used to letting her have her way all the time. It wasn't so bad after all.

Continued In Unicron: Part E


	5. Chapter 5

Maelstrom Chapter 24  
Unicron PART 

Author's note: This story is part of a LONG series called Maelstrom. It is strictly Gen. 1 - sorry, but that was all that was out when I started writing back in the late 1980's. It began as a fan-publication so the first chapters are in the form of a comic book! If you have not read the nine original **Maelstrom Comics** and the preceding text stories, I strongly suggest you do. This is a complex universe. They can be found at http// illmatar. deviantart. com (I have put double spaces between the URL here or FF . Net eats the link.) The comics and art which accompanies this series are there...and believe me I am a better artist than writer.

This scene contains strong language and Dubious Humor. IT CONTAINS SOME MAJOR DEVELOPMENTS BETWEEN CHARACTERS BUT IS GENERALLY A FLUFF SCENE.

**Most chapters of this series contain strong language and violence. Rated M for adult themes! Really! Transformers characters belong to Hasbro. Critiques adored!**

Maelstrom Chapter 25 Unicron: PART E

It was a long night for both of them. After their initial passion was spent, Magnus suffered another relapse of fear. It seemed whenever there was nothing else to occupy his attention, Unicron's violation was waiting to fill in the gaps. Marissa was sound asleep in his arms and he only had to look at her to see the strain of the previous weeks. Weeks! It was simply unbelievable. He didn't remember much, and what he did remember made little sense. Marissa had told him very little - her voice had already been slurring by the time her climax had passed. She had simply leaned forward into his embrace, resting her head on his chest and leaving the connection between them intact. She had mumbled a few things about being glad to have him back, and how hard it had been to take care of him, and was now snoring away on top of him. Her nose was still swollen, and her eyes were lined with both the red of tears, and the grey of extreme fatigue.

Magnus was frightened - but he didn't have the heart to wake her. It was his fault she was in such a state in the first place.

He shivered in the darkness.

This wasn't like him. He knew this wasn't like him. He was the calm one. The strong one. The one who got upset over stupidity and incompetence, not fear. Never fear. So how come he trembled now at the shadows? Why couldn't he feel safe? Marissa's quarters were amongst the most secure on Cybertron, especially now that she was part of Rodi's inner circle, and the assassin Prime was seeing to it that Cybertron was sealed down in a fashion unprecedented in all its history.

Maybe it was because Magnus knew, with undeniable certainty, that all of Rodi's precautions, scanners, and deadly traps were useless against a being like Unicron. And while Unicron might be dead - THERE WERE OTHERS OUT THERE.

Even if Lancer had never been possessed as well, Magnus would have known this. Unicron's thoughts during the possession were a part of Magnus' memories now. He understood the life-cycles of these creatures as if he were one of them and it was knowledge he would have been glad to be rid of. Maybe there was one here now - feeding off his terror - waiting for a way in.... He shuddered in pure horror - he couldn't endure the thought. What if it got into him? What if it got into HER? He clasped his arms around Marissa more tightly, knowing it was a pointless gesture. She sighed and smiled in her sleep.

She loved him. She trusted him. Didn't she know he couldn't protect her? Didn't she see how quickly and absolutely he'd been defeated?

You defeated him! You threw him out! Her words echoed hollowly in his mind. Sure. He'd thrown Unicron out. AFTER he'd let Unicron rape his mind. AFTER he'd let Unicron attack Rodimus. AFTER he'd betrayed his love for Marissa to the fiend. AFTER he'd nearly let the beast kill her with his own hands.

It didn't seem like much of a victory to Ultra Magnus. He wept with shame. He didn't need to bring back Unicron's hollow voice to tell him he was weak, stupid, useless, and a danger to those he loved. He could do that just fine by himself. Some part of him knew that Unicron's abuse of his memories was a deliberate attempt to cause more pain for the entity to feed on, but Unicron was no amateur. Nothing he'd said to Magnus was a blatant lie. It ALL made some kind of sense. It was all in some way true and while it was very easy for Magnus to tell himself to look for the lies in what Unicron had said, it was not easy to find them.

It wasn't ten minutes before Magnus had convinced himself that Unicron had been right. He had been easy to possess because his soul was corrupt and petty, that all of his success was purely do to his physical strength, and that even the most craven cowards of the Decepticon ranks had more strength of character than he did.

And Marissa wanted to marry him! This beautiful, vital woman. The one who so often rendered him speechless with her courage and determination. He laughed bitterly in the darkness. He shouldn't be allowed in the same room with her! He thought of fleeing, of running and running until no one could find him but he didn't move because he knew it would wake her. He had deprived her of enough sleep already. He could run later. That way no one would ever be hurt, or sad, or exhausted again because of his weak soul. Yes. He would protect them with his absence. It was the least he could do...and...and.... Where had he heard this before...?

He paused in his internal self-mutilation. It puzzled him. Certainly, he had never thought such things before. He had been wrapped up in a shameful cloak of self-confidence all his life - thinking he deserved his promotions, thinking his hard work counted for something. Poor self-deluded fool. But he had heard this before, this reasoning that others would be better off if he weren't there. Where? Who?

The answer when it came, chilled him.

Lancer.

Lancer, his fellow possessee. Lancer, who knew what it was to have her will usurped, her very core exposed, exploited, and molested. The one no one understood, who's fear made others shake their heads. She was the one who had expressed the attitude he was now emulating. She had even run. AND IT HADN'T WORKED. He remembered Rodimus' desperate sadness only too well. He remembered the dangerous extremes her friends had gone to to find her. He didn't want Marissa to suffer that way, even if he felt unworthy of her love, he knew for sure she did love him, and that she would track him down if he ran.

So where did that leave him? What could he do? Try to convince her NOT to love him? Could he do that? Was he strong enough? He remembered running to Rodimus in desperation when she'd been angry because she'd thought he'd betrayed her. He tried to imagine facing her, saying cruel things to push her away. He couldn't do it. He just couldn't. This did nothing to help him think better of himself.

He understood Lancer's fears only too well now.

And what of Lancer? Had she been deserving of what happened to her? Magnus shuddered. No one deserved that. (Then how can you? a small part of him whispered.) He ignored that. Hadn't he been one of those who'd shaken their heads in confusion when she held others at bay? Hadn't he himself told Rodimus that he thought she was brave for enduring what she had? More brave than ever he'd realized. Possession had seemed terrible to his imagination but the reality was far worse.

He spent about an hour frozen in horror at the memory of that reality, but finally returned to his mental debate. Was he now brave for enduring this? Was he enduring this? Could he cope? Or would he slowly lose his mind to what had happened? Maybe he had lost it already. Round and round his thoughts ran. It seemed like his mind had been split in two.

One side of him told him that he was just wounded, that this terrible pain and self-doubt was a natural part of the healing process. He'd seen it before in others. He was a warrior. He knew the signs of trauma. He recognized them in Lancer didn't he? He saw them in Rodimus. In Shellshock. In countless soldiers on both sides of the war with the Decepticons. What made him think he would respond any differently? Was that his arrogance? Did he think he was immune?

And then there was the other side. The side that shivered and sobbed inside him. The side that never wanted to face the world again. The side that felt ugly, and small, and tried to pull away from Marissa for fear that she would see what a slimy little slug he was.

Long hours in the dark he lay there, still and cold under Marissa's warm body, fighting the most difficult and violent battle of his life against himself - with neither side gaining clear advantage. Tears were still running silent down his cheeks when Marissa suddenly jerked awake just before dawn.

She saw his fixed stare at the ceiling and panicked.

"MAGNUS?!" she shrieked, coming fully awake in one terrible instant.

He turned his eyes down to hers but couldn't bring himself to speak. Her panic saddened him. Why would she put herself through this for the likes of him? His silence did nothing to calm her.

"MAGNUS!" she cried again, even more sharply.

"It's OK," he choked, his voice cracking. It wasn't OK at all, but he refused to hurt her more by saying it. "I'm fine." Damn. He had to learn to control his voice better. He wished he could approach Rodimus for lessons on how to act fine when you were falling apart. The kid was a pro.

"You aren't fine! How could you possibly be fine after what you've just been through?! What are you thinking? DAMN YOU! Don't you dare try to shut me out!" Marissa's voice was strident with concern and indignation.

Damn it woman. Why do you have to be so smart? OK Magnus. What are you going to do now? No answers came to him. i've got to protect her/I can't/she never believes me when i lie/its useless/i'm useless/whatam i going to do/i can't think of anything/nice strategy mistercitycommander/ unicronwasrightallalong/ i'vegottoprotecther /protect her fromme/ ican't/ican't/ican'ticanticanticanticant

"Magnus! What are you thinking!? Talk to me damn you!"

"I CAN'T!! I JUST C...CAN'T!" He shouted, then started sobbing in an uncontrollable series of hiccups. He wrenched himself out from under her and scrambled away. Somehow she must have sensed he was about to bolt, and placed herself between him and the door. He could have pushed past her easily but somehow the look on her face presented a barrier he couldn't cross. He curled up in the corner, sobbing.

Naturally she came over and put a hand on his shoulders. She drew back immediately in hurt confusion when he flinched away from her touch as if burned.

"Of course you can! Magnus, you can tell me anything. I love you, nothing's going to change that."

"I know," he said hopelessly. "I'm sorry."

"Y..You're sorry? Magnus? What does that mean? Don't...don't you love me anymore?"

"OH. NONono Marissa!" Why did everything he said have to come out all wrong and hurt her more?

"What then? Magnus! Tell me what you mean!"

What the hell? He might as well spill it.

His teeth were chattering so hard he could barely make himself discernible. "T..That you l..love me! T..That you d..don't n..n..know what I a..am! T..that I'm j..just this cowardly l..little m..maggot ...and I m...made you love me somehowandI don't deserve you I don't deserve an...anything but contempt...and..and...."

"Oh my God! Stop it Magnus! Just stop it! Stop it!" Marissa shrieked. She put her hands over her ears, she couldn't stand what had been done to him. She couldn't stand that horrible broken little voice coming out of his mouth as if he was still possessed, spewing such filth into the air. Evil. Petty little evil thoughts. The battle with Unicron wasn't over. He was still there. HIS abuse lived on in her mate, tainting everything he was and she was going to have to fight the Chaos Bringer for as long as it took until he was exorcized from her mate's soul.

"...and I'm like t..this sl..sl..imy l..leech ..and it all a l..lie..and.."

"Shhh," Marissa said, reinstating her embrace and clutching him harder and harder until he quit resisting. "It's all going to be OK. You're just hurt, that's all."

"B...but..."

She sat up and glared at him. "No! Now you listen to me! That's Unicron talking! It's not true! I'M telling you it's not true! And who do you believe in? Unicron or me?"

"B...But...."

"NO BUT! We need to get this straight right now Ultra Magnus! Who do you believe in?! UNICRON or ME?!" Her fist balled up again ominously.

Magnus stared at her; his mouth worked soundlessly for a moment. "Y...You."

"RIGHT! You just keep that in mind Mister! Don't you ever think, not for one single second, that some slimy little space parasite knows MY man better than I do! Is that totally clear? When it comes to Ultra Magnus I'm a fucking expert! If you have any doubts, you consult MY wisdom. That's an order! Now let me spell this out for you! I...LOVE....YOU. I have every intention of spending my short little lifetime with YOU. And if you are a cowardly little maggot, then I intend to spend my days with a cowardly little maggot and I intend to be very happy doing it! Don't you EVER push me away or try to lie to me that way again! Or I will show you a whole new definition of the word suffering!" She was poking him in the chest to emphasize each phrase and had him backed up flat against the wall.

His eyes were as wide as saucers. He stared at her. He stared at her some more. She glared into his face - her lower lip jutting out defiantly - daring him to say one word, just one word to contradict her. As usual he knew when he was outmatched, and he almost smiled.

She sagged in relief, and resumed her embrace, knowing that while the war wasn't over, she had just won what was probably the most crucial battle.

"I feel so filthy," he said at last.

"Oh. Well then how's about a shower?" Marissa said, with a seductive smile.

X

X

X

After it was over, Magnus stepped out of the shower and toweled himself off. Half-way through the process he stopped and turned back to look at it as if he'd never seen it before.

"What is it?" Marissa asked quietly.

"Did you...? I mean...... I sort of remember. Great Cybertron Marissa! How did you get me in there?" He sized up her body and couldn't imagine what she'd done.

By the time she was done explaining the process, he was again struck speechless. How in the hell was he deemed worthy of such devotion? How could anyone be worth all of that?

She must have read his mind. "You would have done the same for me."

"Well, of course but..."

"Shh. Stop right there. It doesn't matter why. It was worth it. I'm telling you it was. You just have to accept that fact because I'm telling you it was."

"But... OW!"

She had pinched him cruelly. "I believed we have established the no 'Buts' rule. Every time I get a 'but' from you, your butt gets something from me."

"It's just incredible to me, that's all."

"HAH! You don't know the half of it!" Marissa said. "Here's what you're worth to me and your friends you big dope." She proceeded to give him a list of the Herculean efforts made on his behalf.

She'd hardly begun when he'd interrupted with "I need to sit down."

And again a little later with "FIVE bottles of tabasco sauce?!"

And yet again with "HE SAID WHAT?!"

And finally with "That's it! They're dead men!"

"Now Magnus! They were just trying to help you," Marissa said, but she was smiling to herself. In his righteous indignation, Magnus had forgotten his pain and was acting like his old self, at least for the moment.

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT!" Magnus snarled. It wasn't that he wasn't grateful. He was stunned with gratitude, but there were some things one just couldn't ignore - even if one had been catatonic. "When are they coming back?"

"Probably this afternoon. Lancer and KC will be around for sure. Lancer has no definite schedule and Perceptor never notices when KC leaves anyway. Carly said she might be by, but Spike, Elita, and Optimus are off world again. I never know when Rodimus and Jazz will make it. They are making up for Optimus, Elita, me, AND you being gone. Somehow, they almost always manage to pop in for a few good insults though."

"By the Matrix. How are they managing?"

"I think Lancer is helping, and I know for sure KC is. Other than that, Rodimus just claims it's no worse than it was before you stormed in and fucked up all his plans to be a martyr doing everything on his own."

"He would put it that way. OK. This is what we are going to do..." Magnus said, with a sly smile that brought tears of joy to Marissa's eyes.

X

X

X

The door chimed. Marissa answered it. Her hair was frazzled, and she did her best to move slowly. There were still circles under her eyes, but if someone had looked close enough they might have noticed it was more the color of smeared eye-liner than tired flesh.

She opened the door and yelped when she was attacked by foliage.

"HERE!" Rodimus sang. "FLOWERS!" Trust Rodimus to turn a bouquet of daisies into an assault weapon.

"Here again!" He said, thrusting an oddly shaped, cold package into her nerveless hand. "I found out about this stuff today at the grocery store. It's called limburger cheese. It stinks! I think it might possibly be the worst thing I've ever smelled. Mags will like it! Won't you Mags?!" he cried at the still figure on the couch. Like a red-headed tornado, he whirled into Marissa's living room, giving her time to notice that there actually were other people in the doorway. Lancer was rolling her eyes, KC had obviously vowed to ignore Rodimus at all costs, and even Jazz was looking a bit wide-eyed.

Rodimus must be very tired, Marissa thought. This is over the top even for him. She fought not to giggle out loud.

Lancer gave her a look which was both evaluating and apologetic. "I DID try to talk him out of it, Marissa. You might just want to hide it somewhere when he isn't looking."

"I heard that!" Rodimus shouted from behind Magnus' seat. He was looking under the couch.

"You were meant to!" Lancer snapped.

"Rodimus? What are you doing?!" Marissa said. Control the voice. Control the voice.

"I'm looking for Magnus' personality. I know there isn't much too it, but I figured if I looked hard enough I juuust might spot it! Wait! Wait! No. It's just a dust bunny. Don't worry Mags," he said, giving the still figure a fierce nuggie, "we won't rest until we've found it. Right Jazz?"

"Right Prime! It's a quest! The most difficult we've ever dared!"

Marissa saw Magnus' hands twitch and nearly lost it.

"How are you holding up?" KC asked compassionately over the din.

"I'm...fine," Marissa said, choking on a laugh that she tried to make sound like a sob.

KC patted her arm with a familiarity that would have been undreamt of a few weeks ago. Lancer gave the Captain a look though and then turned her attention on Marissa's mate.

Rodimus and Jazz were holding separate pieces of fuzz off the floor in front of Magnus' slack face and arguing over which one was smaller, apparently the deciding factor as to which was the Major General's "personality."

The moment Marissa had been dreading arrived. Lancer scanned Magnus. Her eyes widened.

"Uh, boys..." she said in a stunned voice.

"HEY!" Rodimus interrupted. "Can't you see this is a very important discussion?!"

Lancer stared at her beloved and then smiled sweetly. "I'm sorry," she said. "Please continue."

Rodimus paused, a little bit suspicious, as he always was when she smiled that way. Jazz stuck his piece of lint in Rodi's face though and he immediately fell back into heated debate. Magnus let his eyes shift from one to the other. They didn't notice.

He leaned forward and said, "Hi!"

They gawked at him, and said "Uh-oh"" in unison, just before his poised hands clapped both of their heads together.

Lancer roared. KC had her mouth hanging open, although the shocked expression rapidly grew into a wide, happy smile. Rodimus and Jazz were rolling on the floor holding their skulls in pain. They were laughing nonetheless.

"Ow." Jazz said. "Ow. Ow. Ow. Ow."

Rodimus looked up into Magnus' smirking face, still holding his own head, and fell back to the floor in hysterics. He couldn't imagine a better sight than that evil, smug smile right now and somehow the pain made it funnier. Laughter seemed the best and only way to express his relief.

"Man, that was cruel," Jazz said, rubbing the knot on his head. Funny that he was still grinning even as he bitched. "We were only tryin' to wake you up."

"I just didn't want you enjoying yourself too much! Or thinking that this was going to continue!" Magnus said, leaning back with a self-satisfied smirk.

"Are you really OK?" Rodimus said, gently, without a trace of silliness.

Magnus met his eyes sadly. "I'll be fine, Rodi," he said with a faint shrug. He knew better than to think he could hide his pain from Rodimus. Rodimus knew better.

A shadow came to stand over him, and he looked up to meet Lancer's eyes. He sensed a new understanding pass between them, and an incredible sense of support. She knew. She'd BEEN there. "Yes, you will be OK, Magnus."

Impulsively, he took her arm at the wrist, and felt hers grasp his firmly in return. They made a pact of it.

Jazz stumbled to his feet, still giving the occasional "Ow" and looking to KC for sympathy.

"Forget it," the scientist said. "You've been asking for it for weeks."

"Aw, but Casey!"

"Fftt! Talk to the hand!" she said, pushing his face away with it.

"Ow! Heartless wench!" Jazz said.

"Hey!" Lancer said. "I DID try to warn you two."

"You could have tried a little harder,"" Rodimus said in disgust, also getting to his feet.

"Yes, I suppose I could!" she said, winking at Magnus and giving his hand a final squeeze before she went to look at her mate's grave injuries. "You'll live," she told him. Magnus grinned at her, and continued to grin unfazed at Rodi's sour expression.

"What now?" KC asked.

"Well, for starters," Marissa said going around the back of the couch and taking Magnus' hand from behind, "We have an announcement to make."

"Oh no," Rodimus said, "This sounds ominous."

"We are getting married," Marissa said succinctly.

There were two distinct thuds as Jazz and Rodimus promptly hit the floor again.


End file.
